Did anyone one else turn 30 and have a massive change in their personality
October 17, 2025
I turned 30 two years ago and eventually sort of mellowed out and become more quiet and reserved also far more introspective with myself and changed my priorities, did this happen to anyone else?
26 comments
No. Having children changed me rather profoundly for the better, I think.
I was a grumpy prick before and I’m a grumpy prick now; just with more grumpy
[deleted]
For me I mellowed out after life threw me a few L’s all at once, and coincidentally I was 30 when that happened.
I became homeless at 29 with nothing but the clothes I was wearing after my bag was stolen. I spent 10 months unemployed, cracked out of my mind and committing petty crimes. That period forced brutal changes in my personality.
Yeah. I hate people now.
I’m converting to Christianity, so yes
Yep. Turned 30 when Covid 19 hit. After Covid went away i suddenly was an Unc
I don’t know about massive but that is definitely when I noticed what I call ‘natural authority’ started to kick in. Meaning people started to auto-magically treat me in a more adult way as I started to look, feel, and act a bit more adult. At 31 I noticed it very distinctly, and it was really nice.
Now when I look at people just turning 30 they still kind of look like kids to me, but not as post-adolescent as twentysomethings.
edit: sp
I’m much more outgoing than when I was younger. Mostly due to confidence and learning better social skills with age
Yes, went from starving musician to corporate lawyer. I just got serious about working and all that. Feel like I have the same personality though. I’m just more focused now
Party me really slowed down. Night and day from what I used to be. Focused on what I eat, how I sleep, and what physical activity I’m doing that day. Also hate packed standing bars and loud places now.
Oddly, I got louder and more open with people. Don’t think that’s how it’s supposed to go.
35
Yes — I’m very stoic and nonchalant whereas I used to wide eyed and excited about everything.
Mostly due to just understanding more and more about a wide variety of topics as well as having more responsibility (job, lots of money, gf).
My people pleasing completely went away after I turned 30.
I became way less concerned about what people thought of me and started to focus way more on what made me happy
I changed in my early 30s got married and had my son. It was time to be responsible and get serious.
Yes, much like the mental shift that happened at 25. I started doing more introspection and started challenging my methods of thinking. Through that I was able to shake off a lot of insecurities and anxieties. As a result, I became more outgoing and made more friends. I’m still somewhat reserved and quiet but that’s not a bad thing at all. In fact, I find just asking the right questions and letting people talk has been more beneficial than forcing any interaction. Moving away from my hometown played a big part in forcing me to do that. My son who will be here in the coming weeks has forced another huge mental shift in me again.
Yo that’s called maturity 👌
I had a change in my career around 29, and mellowed a lot in my 30s. And then became more aggressive in other areas.
I appreciated my friends a lot more, I didn’t bother with people I thought were distractions. I found it easier to connect with people and was much better at building relationships.
How I became more aggressive – I probably would have been a bit of a door mat in some situations. I stood up for myself more. Some people called me aggressive. I called it not taking people’s crap.
30s fucked me sideways with no lube and a big ol cactus cock. I realized that somewhere I really fucked up not pursuing higher education than shoeing horses. Now im pretty much dependant working a shit paying job barely able to cover my truck payment and internet bill each month.
Im so lucky the lady has a solid position managing key accounts for a rather large equine store. I do what I can ifc but it seems its never enough and im inadequate at best. All my 30s gave me as a positive is the gym.
Yea major depressive episode led to sort of just existing for a bit. Then hiking the Rocky Mountains awakened my soul and made me realize I actually can experience positive emotion when doing things I love and not grinding out corporate shit. Now I’m struggling to find meaning in a 9-5 life again. But in generally more flat and less excitement for life once all my friends got married and had kids. Some already divorced.
Went the other way. I used to be the most patient and calm person, but I haven’t slept properly since my first kid was born, and I’ve been permanently irritable ever since.
I did, too. In my 20s I was really outgoing, very social, going out all the time, etc., but these days I’m much more of a homebody and prefer keeping to myself most of the time. In my case, I’m not so sure it was my age, but the fact that I was just coming out of a couple years of depression at the time. Came out different than when I went in, and have been this way ever since.
More confident and experienced and relaxed. Taken more seriously. Mostly all good.
Yes, I am significantly more extraverted than I was when I was younger and considerably less anxious and inhibited too. While I was trying to be more sociable and adventurous before the pandemic, the social-distancing experience showed a sharp distinction between what I want from my life and what most of my friends couldn’t get enough of. Also, I’m single and not getting younger, and in a low-opportunity city, it’s just not going to happen “living your life” or “enjoying hobbies” (most likely); the opportunities I care about have to be actively sought out or found somewhere else. Having traveled more, I know the problem is definitely where I currently live.
26 comments
No. Having children changed me rather profoundly for the better, I think.
I was a grumpy prick before and I’m a grumpy prick now; just with more grumpy
[deleted]
For me I mellowed out after life threw me a few L’s all at once, and coincidentally I was 30 when that happened.
I became homeless at 29 with nothing but the clothes I was wearing after my bag was stolen. I spent 10 months unemployed, cracked out of my mind and committing petty crimes. That period forced brutal changes in my personality.
Yeah. I hate people now.
I’m converting to Christianity, so yes
Yep. Turned 30 when Covid 19 hit. After Covid went away i suddenly was an Unc
I don’t know about massive but that is definitely when I noticed what I call ‘natural authority’ started to kick in. Meaning people started to auto-magically treat me in a more adult way as I started to look, feel, and act a bit more adult. At 31 I noticed it very distinctly, and it was really nice.
Now when I look at people just turning 30 they still kind of look like kids to me, but not as post-adolescent as twentysomethings.
edit: sp
I’m much more outgoing than when I was younger. Mostly due to confidence and learning better social skills with age
Yes, went from starving musician to corporate lawyer. I just got serious about working and all that. Feel like I have the same personality though. I’m just more focused now
Party me really slowed down. Night and day from what I used to be. Focused on what I eat, how I sleep, and what physical activity I’m doing that day. Also hate packed standing bars and loud places now.
Oddly, I got louder and more open with people. Don’t think that’s how it’s supposed to go.
35
Yes — I’m very stoic and nonchalant whereas I used to wide eyed and excited about everything.
Mostly due to just understanding more and more about a wide variety of topics as well as having more responsibility (job, lots of money, gf).
My people pleasing completely went away after I turned 30.
I became way less concerned about what people thought of me and started to focus way more on what made me happy
I changed in my early 30s got married and had my son. It was time to be responsible and get serious.
Yes, much like the mental shift that happened at 25. I started doing more introspection and started challenging my methods of thinking. Through that I was able to shake off a lot of insecurities and anxieties. As a result, I became more outgoing and made more friends. I’m still somewhat reserved and quiet but that’s not a bad thing at all. In fact, I find just asking the right questions and letting people talk has been more beneficial than forcing any interaction. Moving away from my hometown played a big part in forcing me to do that. My son who will be here in the coming weeks has forced another huge mental shift in me again.
Yo that’s called maturity 👌
I had a change in my career around 29, and mellowed a lot in my 30s. And then became more aggressive in other areas.
I appreciated my friends a lot more, I didn’t bother with people I thought were distractions. I found it easier to connect with people and was much better at building relationships.
How I became more aggressive – I probably would have been a bit of a door mat in some situations. I stood up for myself more. Some people called me aggressive. I called it not taking people’s crap.
30s fucked me sideways with no lube and a big ol cactus cock. I realized that somewhere I really fucked up not pursuing higher education than shoeing horses. Now im pretty much dependant working a shit paying job barely able to cover my truck payment and internet bill each month.
Im so lucky the lady has a solid position managing key accounts for a rather large equine store. I do what I can ifc but it seems its never enough and im inadequate at best. All my 30s gave me as a positive is the gym.
Yea major depressive episode led to sort of just existing for a bit. Then hiking the Rocky Mountains awakened my soul and made me realize I actually can experience positive emotion when doing things I love and not grinding out corporate shit. Now I’m struggling to find meaning in a 9-5 life again. But in generally more flat and less excitement for life once all my friends got married and had kids. Some already divorced.
Went the other way. I used to be the most patient and calm person, but I haven’t slept properly since my first kid was born, and I’ve been permanently irritable ever since.
I did, too. In my 20s I was really outgoing, very social, going out all the time, etc., but these days I’m much more of a homebody and prefer keeping to myself most of the time. In my case, I’m not so sure it was my age, but the fact that I was just coming out of a couple years of depression at the time. Came out different than when I went in, and have been this way ever since.
More confident and experienced and relaxed. Taken more seriously. Mostly all good.
Yes, I am significantly more extraverted than I was when I was younger and considerably less anxious and inhibited too. While I was trying to be more sociable and adventurous before the pandemic, the social-distancing experience showed a sharp distinction between what I want from my life and what most of my friends couldn’t get enough of. Also, I’m single and not getting younger, and in a low-opportunity city, it’s just not going to happen “living your life” or “enjoying hobbies” (most likely); the opportunities I care about have to be actively sought out or found somewhere else. Having traveled more, I know the problem is definitely where I currently live.