My boyfriend (36 M) and I (29 F) have been dating for 7.5 months. I absolutely adore him to bits. I told him that I’m falling in love with him 2 months into dating because I really felt it, and he did not say it back (which I was/am accepting of). Initially he told me he has a “3 month rule” that he’ll hold off on using those words until it’s been 3 months to make sure it isn’t just infatuation, which to me was completely understandable. Around 5 months of dating I checked in to see how he felt about me saying it, and he told me he will not tell someone “I love you” in a relationship unless he’s ready to basically get engaged.
Now that it’s been 7.5 months I’m starting to feel more uncomfortable with this. I have no intention to rush him whatsoever; I understand that maybe for him, he simply doesn’t feel that way about me at this time. He seems to believe that verbally expressing love is a very serious thing. But the more time we spend together, I get stronger urges to say the words and it’s genuinely hard for me to hold back my feelings. He told me he is totally fine with me saying the words but he won’t say it back, but that just feels weird to me to be the only one saying it, makes things feel very one sided.
I don’t really know what to do in this situation. I want to express how I feel to him but it feels wrong when we’re not on the same page. I don’t expect to get married to him tomorrow and even if he did say it, I wouldn’t expect some grand gesture, but I wish so badly we could say it to each other and it would make me feel closer to him. What should I do in this situation?
TLDR; Boyfriend told me he won’t say “I love you” in a relationship until he’s ready to buy someone a ring. I feel like I have to force myself to hold back from saying the words now even though I feel it. Not sure how to handle this.