I’ve 23m been dating my gf 26f for a little over a year now. I will preface this by saying I’ve never rly been one to get bothered by someone’s past or anything. But this one was a little different. We met at work when I transferred there, and we started dating about 3 months after we met. We started talking a lot at work for several weeks, flirting, went out etc. I found out talking to a coworker (that got hired after I got there) that during about my second month there they had been “talking”. She swore to everyone they weren’t dating so I didn’t think much of it. Fast forward to two days after our 1st date, which went great, I see her at work. To my surprise she’s visibly upset and barely talking to me. She didn’t rly tell me anything that day but as time went on she eventually told me the other coworker had assaulted her the night after our date. I felt awful ofc and tried to help much as I could. One thing that did stick out to me though was that when she told me about it, she didn’t give many details but said “it was sex, I’m sure you can tell”. That could very well be me just overthinking but it just seemed like an odd comment talking ab smth like that. Anyways the main problem for me is that almost a year into the relationship, I found photos on her phone of nudes, post sex pics, showing stuff off to her friends ab it, and other things and they were from her seeing that same coworker. Some of which were within a day or two of our first date. I confronted her about it, and she apologized profusely, and told me “I swear I forgot that was there (it was hidden), it didn’t mean anything, I regret it so much, I was depressed and wanted attention”. she ultimately deleted everything and I said I was good but it still gets in my head and kinda bothers me. It’s the only “argument” we’ve ever had but it’s been so long and it is actually the healthiest relationship I’ve had, I’d like to just forget about it but idk if I even made a big enough deal ab it in the first place and I hate thinking ab how that was right as and before she started dating me. It does feel like she lied to me and hid stuff from me, and it’s kinda hard to believe she forgot it was all there when it had just happened but I don’t think she lies to me. It’s also been so long I don’t know if I should bring it up. Should I have broken up with her when I found those things? Or How do I let her know it bothers me without seeming so insecure?
TL;DR
About a year into our relationship I found nudes, sex pics, and more on her phone of her from being w a guy that ended up s a ing her right as we started dating. I did not know they were hu before. I let it go for a while but idk if I should’ve broken up with her then wen I found out, or how to tell her how it still makes m feel without seeming so insecure.