I f26 and my husband m23 have been married for a year now but together for about 4. We’ve had issues off and on (ones I won’t deny I mostly started) but always ended up okay again up until recently.
It’s like we can’t have one good day, whether it’s arguing over something about our daughter, one of us sleeping too long, who’s going to clean, or not spending enough time together because of playing a video game or being on his phone. But today really opened my eyes.
I am currently 6 weeks pregnant, I had a miscarriage about 2 1/2 months ago. I also have chronic kidney disease and the last few days I’ve been having other weird symptoms. Yesterday I went to the bathroom and when I got up realized there was a ton of blood in the toilet. My first reaction was okay, I’m miscarrying again but as I wipes and waited for more blood there was none so I was like “okay is this from my urine?”. Well I go tell my husband and call the nhs 111 number and they tell me to go to the hospital within the hour because all my symptoms and the bleeding happening.
I tell my husband and he calls his mom and they’re both like “wait till morning because it’s going to be packed at night and I don’t want to sit there for 10 hours” I tell reluctantly tell them that’s fine bc obviously I’m not feeling the greatest as is and I’m worried I’m miscarrying on top of it all.
Morning comes and I ask him when we’re going, he says when my mom gets home.
His mom comes home, I ask him again “soon”. THEN he goes out to a hardware store.. he comes home goes to the garden and starts burning all the old trees and things . During all this I’m starting to feel worse, it’s getting harder to breathe and it feels like my lungs are burning my back and if I stand too long my ears start ringing and my chest hurts. I go ask him again, he said “you made me feel guilty so we’ll go in the evening”.
ONCE AGAIN reluctantly I agreed and went to our room with our daughter and fell asleep. Finally he comes upstairs and as I’m about to ask if we can go now, his mom calls to tell him she’s going out again. So at this point I’m actually upset because I’ve been asking this whole time and it’s like no one is taking me seriously.
I start crying and telling him I don’t feel good and that something is wrong, to just get me an uber or just drop me off and I’ll go by myself but he proceeds to tell me “it’s just the flu” and “nobody feels good it’s just something going around and that I need to stop crying” SO I cry even harder because atp I’m actually pissed off because I keep trying to explain that what I’m feeling is not the flu or a sickness. Eventually I tell him he’s a shit husband and that if I could leave I would. But this whole interaction made me realize I’m starting to hate this man. Not just for this but for other things he minimized as well. Like a few weeks ago I broke my foot, he didn’t want to take me to the hospital because he didn’t believe it was that bad until they told him it was in fact broken.
The problem is I can’t do anything and I’m stuck because I’m not from the uk and have no one here to help me leave. Im really starting to hate my husband.