There’s a lot to be said but in short, our relationship has been in the dumps for the last few years. Things got really tough after the kids and we don’t have a strong relationship to begin with. We’ve both moved 4 hours from our original home and she doesn’t have any family around. I have my mother and brother here in town with me my fiancé is a stay at home mom and unfortunately I’ve never been in the position to comfortably support this lifestyle, however I’ve done my very best to make due. In no way has our relationship been perfect and there has been hurtful things said on both ends.
The issue at hand is not the deal breaker rather the straw that broke the camels back. Last night we had a small dispute about the amount of hair care product I helped her get into her scalp, not enough. So I took a step out of the bathroom to compose myself because her response to it felt demeaning “did you even put anything on my head?” This sparked an argument as she came in the room and told me I was wrong for being sensitive and “it’s clear I don’t want to be around her” so she went downstairs and later in the night I sent a text in response, more angry texts ensued. So I was really at a loss and texted my mom how I was frustrated and asked her if she thinks I’m emotionally unintelligent and how I can fix this. She responded with “she’s just the same old same old all the time”.
So this morning I was woken up at 9am not super early but I just didn’t sleep well the night before I know my bad to her yelling at me saying how it’s not fair that me and my mother talk badly about her behind her back, how much she’s changed and it’s crazy. funny how this thing is about change and this isn’t the first time she’s went through my phone and I’ve expressed disagreement.
I’ll end this all by also being sure to say I’ve never cheated I’ve never been a cheater or someone who texts or has too many friends so nothing to fear there.
I just don’t know where to go from here I had a freak out about it cause she’s stonewalling me and bringing up my childhood. We have kids and I’ve been at a loss for months about this. I’ve recently got counseling to help manage my anger and outbursts and to help me get things off my chest as this is an issue for me. I’ve asked her to do the same but she hasn’t gone for it, of course with the ultimate goal being couples counseling.