I (20m) have never been in a relationship and have never done anything sexual. I am trans ftm so until I transition enough to feel comfortable sex is completely off the table. I am also waiting for a long term partner but I have questions since I have no experience or anyone to talk to.
I occasionally read smut. Nothing that I don't think is super freaky (nothing wrong with it just not my thing) and in reading I've discovered kinks that I didn't know existed. There are a few I'd want to try one day but what does that conversation typically look like? How awkward is it (i have anxiety and awkward conversations freak me out), and how weird is it after the rejection? There are a few that are kind of odd that I'm interested in.
Also, would it be fair to have a partner and never want to give or recieve oral? I can't imagine myself wanting to be on either side but I don't know if thats fair on a potential partner. I've heard other people say how amazing it feels on both sides but I don't think I could get over the texture or taste.