When I met this friend four years ago, I met through a mutual friend. She’s always known me as married. She wasn’t a part of my life when I was single.
She however is single. She’s had two breakups in the past 4 or so years.
But for some reason, she always finds the need to let me know EVERY single time she gets hit on my a guy. And mind you, this always comes after she’s posted provocative pictures, went out of her way to suggest she wants attention etc.
“OMG this guys just hit on me”
“OMG did you see? He said I’m beautiful.”
“OMG he said I have a nice body”
“OMG look! This guy said he wants me”
“Everyone just wants to have *** with me”
And then saying things like “why does every guy want me?”
“I’m beautiful and intelligent. I’ll never be with anyone. I’m happy the way I am and enough for myself. I want to single for the rest of my life”
“I can never be with someone. I’ll never share my life with anyone”
I’ve also noticed that sometimes when we’re out and and somebody tries to have a conversation with me (general conversation. Nothing flirty even) she steps in right away and says “she’s married by the way. I’m single”
And a lot of times when we’re out and someone says something to her like “you’re gorgeous.” Or “I like your outfit”
Literally after we walk away she asks “what did he say? Did you hear him? I didn’t catch that”
almost making sure that I did hear her getting complimented?
But when it happens with me she’s the first to turn around and pretend she didn’t hear anything lol. Although I don’t ask her to confirm like she does with me.
Anyways how do I tell this friend politely that I know what she’s doing and I’m really not interested whether she gets hit on or not. I’m happy with my husband and I’m not insecure or even remotely jealous about missing out on “compliments” from random men.
Lemme add one more thing (sorry this is so long)
Others have noticed the same about her. Although I will say, she does have a way to target everyone based on their individual circumstances as well. For example my husband is average height. He isn’t like 6ft tall but he isn’t on the shorter side either. Just average. (I don’t go for outer looks or appearance. Rather what’s on the inside) she however, whenever gets hit on or whatever also says things like “oh and he’s tall”
Heck we once went to a haunted house during Halloween and this “actor” at the haunted house said something like “I’m not going to let you pass from here” you know how these things are if you’ve ever been to one and she literally said “omg he didn’t let me go. I wouldn’t mind staying there with him. He’s tall too”
Like okay? Then justifies it saying “being tall is just my type. I love tall men” but at the same time says “she wants to remain single all her life and doesn’t see herself sharing her life with anyone because she’s too good for anyone and no man is ever going to be good enough for her”….? Girl make up your mind. Ugh.
Another thing I’d like to talk to her about but she’s so sensitive… idk how to, she recently got a “big girl job”.
Up until now she would always tell me how she goes to “ross”, “Burlington” or thrift stores to do her shopping.
I DONT SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT. I AM NOT JUDGING HERE FYI.
But she’d just tell me about how she shops at these places but never mentioned any price tags before from any of these places. Neither did she ever mention a brand name from these places.
She’d say things like “I was at Ross and found a cute pink top with puffy sleeves”
Anyways after she got this “big girl job” recently, she’s very clearly started sending me screenshots almost everyday, photos and order receipts from places she has started shipping at. These clothes ranging in the higher $100’s per item. Sometimes more.
She started saying things like “omg, I was at the mall and I went to “NAME OF A LUXURY STORE” and got this pair of pants that were for “PRICE” and even though I didn’t need them, I got them cause why not”
Even if she goes to places like nordstrom where they have several different brands she makes sure to mention brand names and price tags now.
Now, I don’t care whether someone wears a $5 T-shirt or a $500 T-shirt. I’ve never felt the need to mention any price tag or anything of that sort to anyone.
She’s started mentioning things like “ugh I stopped at Ross today because my mom wanted to and I literally didn’t find anything there.”
Or “I don’t even shop at burlington anymore. I”m happy with my “brand name” top”
This one time we were at the mall and I was feeling a bit cold so I said “oooh I’m cold I should’ve kept a sweater” and she replied “really? I’m pretty warm in my “brand name” full sleeved body suit”
Like okay??
Even if I talk about an article of clothing I bought that I really like, I say things like “ooh, I was out the other day and saw this really cute summer dress at the mall. (I don’t even mention the name of the store lol) It’s like pink and has a floral print. Its cute”
I’ve told her things like “I don’t think price matters when you like something or when something is good” but I don’t think she gets the cue.
How do I tell her politely that I really don’t care for the price. I’m happy she’s making good money and is able to afford pricey things but my friendship with someone is never based on what one can afford and what one can’t?