I’ve gained about 85 lbs since we met 10 years ago. The voice inside my head has been telling me for years that he’s not attracted to me but I kept dismissing it because the truth was too painful. Hearing him say it now has been soul crushing. He said it in the kindest way he could but I am in pieces. I am going to try and lose the weight but I don’t know how I’m going to deal with this feeling until then. I feel like I don’t even want him to look at me. I recently started some medication which has increased my libido and we’ve been having sex daily, sometimes twice. I feel so pathetic for how desperate I’ve been to turn him on and please him in bed.