My partner (M/30) and I (F/28) have been together for a while. Struggles on and off, and most commonly, arguments about sex and bedroom fulfilment. We aren’t as active as most couples our age but I work a pretty exhausting job and by the time the night comes to an end, it’s more of a chore than anything.
For context, the last two days we have had sex. He commonly will help me reach my O, and will keep going, helping me reach an O again.
This morning, he hinted at me giving him head. We had just woken up and I jokingly said no. In honesty, I probably would have helped him out anyway. He immediately went sour and despite me telling him I was joking he wouldn’t let up so I just got up and started my day.
Fast forward about 30 mins. We’re starting breakfast and he says he’s not going to help me to multiple orgasms anymore. He said that he finds it as though I’m getting my needs met but he’s not feeling fulfilled. So he’s not doing it anymore. He’s used this against me in the past too. I’ve told him I’d rather not have him keep going because I know it will eventually lead to him saying things like this. He then said, “don’t be surprised if I start touching myself”.
There are other times in our relationship where he’s used statements like this, I’m not sure if he’s trying to manipulate me or make me feel guilty?
He’s told me that I can’t meet his sexual needs. He’s told me in an argument once that if I can’t meet his needs then he’ll look for it somewhere else.
I’ve been with the guy for almost 8 years, and I really do love him. We have good times together, but I’m reaching my end with the sexual guilt. Am I misinterpreting this?
TLTR – my partner told me he doesn’t want to give me multiple orgasms anymore because I’m “obviously” feeling fulfilled and he’s not.