Buckle up because this is one hell of a story… I am a college freshman and I (18F) and my ex (18M) recently broke up in the beginning of the month. When I first moved in, I had him stay the night since my roommate wouldn't be moving in until the next day. I won't get into the details of everything but he just couldn't get his act together and it's like i'm in college now and I just don't have the time or patience to deal with relationship drama. He also does not go to my university or any university at all which is important to the story.
I made the very dumb decision of not blocking him the day we broke up which you'll see later why this was somewhat a blessing in disguise. And so for him I guess he felt like since he wasn't blocked that there was still an opportunity for us to get back together. He would text me every few days and ask how I was doing and things of the sort. Unknowingly, he has a friend that goes to my university.
We both live an hour away from my university and I stay here on campus and he still lives in my hometown an hour away. So last friday at about 9pm he texts me stating he has a friend that stays here at my university and he's going to be coming to my university and that he wants to see me. So I responded with "We're done, no. So at this point I was already alert that he may pop up that weekend. About an hour and a half later at about 10:20 pm I get a knock on my door. I always look through the peep hole of my door to make sure it's safe to open. So just that I did. My peep hole was completely black so I couldn't see who was outside of my door, and thankfully I wasn't alone.
I open the door and it's him…So immediately I ask him what he's doing here and he says "I told you I was coming." And to that I said "No, I told you not to come here." so we somewhat get into this back and forth and I keep asking him why he's here and he says he's there to get me back and he's asking if we're really done and I keep saying yes. So at this point i'm asking him to leave and making it known that I don't want him here and that he's not welcome. I probably asked him about 50 times to leave and he just refused to do so.
Now this is where he started getting upset, he tried to manipulate and gaslight me by saying I broke up with him for no reason and that my excuse of saying he wouldn't change and get his sh!t together was just an excuse to break up with him and that I don't really want to be broken up… I know crazy right? To that i say how am I supposed to change you for you? And btw I left my door open so I could get back in my room easily in case something happened because to me he was being very unpredictable.
So then, he started calling me stupid and dumb and this is when my suite mates run out of the room telling him not to talk to me that way and we all get into this huge argument in the hallways of my dorm. He finally leaves, and I take a breather and decide i'm going to go down to the RA desk and make a report, Again he does not go to my university so I'm not really sure how he got in with out a university ID. I let the RA desk know that I want to press charges on him and file a police report. The police arrived very shortly after and I'm just giving them the whole story along with his description. The police stepped away for a bit to do paperwork on their side of things and they come back to my room and let me know all the options I have and ask if I still want to follow through with charges and I say yes.
Me and the police are walking out of my room and we get to the elevator, and he was coming up the steps on his way back to my room as me in the cops are at the elevator so we cross paths and I stop in my tracks in shock and the cops ask if that's him and I say yes. They told me to go back to my room and that's when he got arrested. He had been charged with trespassing, and aggravated harassment. He then spent the night in jail, and I spent most of the night at the university police station giving them my statement and filing out paperwork.
I will say I felt very proud of myself for doing what I did all on my own, without my parents taking the legal action for me. At the end of the day, me and my safety come first and he needs to know and understand that consequences have actions and that no means no.