My (M 39) latest example of this, matched with a girl (F 37) on an app probably almost 3 months ago, talked/texted every day, went out a few times, nothing super serious, we were both purposefully taking it slow. Last weekend, we had made plans to hang out and go eat, and about 30 minutes before we were set to meet, she texted me and said "I dont blame you if you're mad, but I cant do this. The idea of getting close to someone has my anxiety way too high. I thought i was ready to date but im just not." How it takes you 3 months of dating to figure this out, im not quite sure, but this is far from the first time ive been given this line.
I'd say over the last few years, ive had probably 10 or so girls tell this to me, sometimes even after dating for a few months. It's almost always "i thought I was ready for a relationship but im just not, im still too hurt from my last relationship" or something very similar. Ive just honestly come to assume that A LOT of women today are either scared of commitment or they just want to keep their options open. Does anyone else experience this fairly regularly? Why in the world would people get on dating apps when theyre not wanting to date or be in a relationship?