I’ve never actually dated before. I’m 22 and have self-sabotaged my way out of any relationship I’ve had the opportunity to enter. I always fixate on all the things that could go wrong even if they’re going right.
Honestly, I’m terrified of feeling trapped in a relationship or having to break up. Before I came out as a lesbian I had dated a guy for nine months in highschool and it was absolutely miserable, and I think that’s part of the reason. Also, the last time I rejected a girl (after three dates) she called me a horrible person and said I hurt her, and that kind of made me feel like absolute shit.
Does anyone have experience with this? I’m currently going to therapy and it’s something on my long list of things to talk about. Is this something that you guys think will improve with experience?