I don't know how the Playboy's do it; getting rich is a fucking grind. I move from city to city every 3 – 9 months, usually to small towns or outside of decent cities, and I work 80hrs a week on a light week. I have my parents and I take care of my siblings who are my base, and the reason I do everything. Other than that, I got the passion of what I do, and the gym.
I can't even begin to figure out how to date. I'm tired of apps and am not getting anywhere with anyone I actually would be long term interested in. The only reason I'd do short term is because I'm having trouble connecting with anyone I would really be excited to start something with. I mean, I have needs, but I'm not into the recycle thing.
What's the secret to real quality connections for me? I don't have a lot of free time. I make money, and I look great. And sure, if I did nothing but try and learn how to date for 6 months I'd probably get good at it. But I really don't have time for late nights, don't have discussion points for random meets, and other than saying "I think you look attractive" I have no game and don't know how to make small talk.
EDIT:
The feedback I'm getting it to cut my hours down. Not as easy as it sounds at the moment. One day in the not-too-distant future I'll be able to not work.
There's no one that looks for this profile?
The problem I'm having is getting the dates in the first place. I would figure out how to take more time off if there was someone worth it. There's no solutions to that to meet people who want this?
23 comments
Hi! 80 hours a week? I think that’s the problem. When will you find time for your partner, which they deserve?
Work less. What’s the point of being rich if you have no time to enjoy life?
>I can’t even begin to figure out how to date.
I honestly don’t think you even have to time to date.
As with everything in life, if you deem it important enough to spend some time to do it, you’ll eventually focus on learning how to do it. All the money in the world can’t buy you happiness if you’re alone.
Brother, it sounds like you not only don’t have the time, but don’t want to take the time to date.
You seem to think that money and the gym are the only things that matter to women. If you don’t have the time and are working presumably 12 hour days, I don’t see how you can date.
Before even trying any of that, you should cut back on work.
Well, it sounds like you really don’t want to prioritize relationships at all in your life, and is looking for some quick fix/magic bullet. Good luck with that.
It’s not a secret dude. Quality connections need quality time.
Ask yourself how you expect to build a “quality connection” with someone and then keep that connection healthy. The answer should be time and energy, that’s what it takes to make relationships work.
If you’re working min 80hr weeks then you won’t have the time or energy for any relationship deeper than casual.
You need to figure out your priorities before seeking a relationship.
I don’t think you’re making the time for a relationship and there’s no instant solution. If you’re in shape and employed that’s cool but no one “worth it” (what does that mean by the way?) is going to be interested a bare minimum relationship effort from you
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Long-term dating is ultimately about finding someone to share a life with. If you are not interested in cutting back your hours, you really don’t have that to offer, regardless of your net worth. If you are not ready to provide long term dating compromise, then “what the playboys do” is lean on your resources. Put expensive, high quality experiences in your photos that telegraph that you are a man of means. Be crystal clear that you are fun and fit, and are looking for someone willing to share these experiences on a short term basis. Women will show up. Granted, these are probably not the women you would want long term, but then, you are not looking for that yet, right?
What is the recycle thing?
Kind of similar boat but a bit less money and way more time but still no dates, I suspect social circle is king but that’s impossible when your always moving.
Can I make a biiiig point here: ok you’re hot and loaded. But even the best conversationalist in the world cannot float a meaningful interaction without interests. Do you follow culture? Politics? What’s your jam?
My only tip is to have interests outside of work and physical connection, otherwise your objective is doomed from the start. Maybe use your minimal free time now to build up a strong sense of what interests you outside of work and gym. Generally speaking: talking extensively about your work on a date is a vibe killer, as it’s just one aspect of (what should be) a well-rounded life. Sure, of course everyone covers the work bases and such, but that’s like a 10 minute conversation (20 tops).
My biggest tip for you is: often on dates, guys would ‘peacock’ to try and impress me, which basically meant talking about themselves for the entire night. Happened so many times, and no there would be no 2nd date from my end. It’s such a vibe killer – women want a connection and shared interest, not a presentation. We don’t find it impressive, we find it rude. So ask her lots of questions! This also helps build conversation organically in date, as you can build on mutual areas of interest of experience.
You need to cultivate workers who you trust to run your business when you cannot because there is no other way you can expect to reduce your workload without taking an income hit. The time management is killing you trying to be a one man army
What you are describing as your personality seems like you are looking for a sugar baby to fuck, not really a relationship.
Money is great and all but after a certain point it becomes superfluous. If you are trying to find a woman (or man) that’s right for you, you have to treat it almost like a job. It requires a ton of skills and experience to be able to actually land a partner you want, who you are interested in.
Your post from less than half a year ago says you’re financially struggling and living with roommate. Now a you’re a millionaire? Sounds suspicious.
But how would you meet someone “worth It” if you have no time? Also I’m a woman and dating isn’t that hard or something you need to learn. You don’t even need “game”. If you’re genuinely kind, attentive, a little chivalrous, respectful, honest and can have a conversation without constantly getting distracted by work texts/calls then you’re good to go. You can find someone you have enough in common with to want to have something long term with. It’s not that complicated
Based on your history of being a passport bro and 6 days ago, commenting “There’s no way I would be caught with a 5. An 8 like that I wouldn’t put any special effort into. If it’s not an easy smash, it’s a quick end.”
You don’t want a real relationship. Or something long term. You’re nearly 40 without a long term relationship for a good reason.
It seems you already stumbled onto the only way that will work for you, buying affection.
Ur a balatro and factorio player. Good luck man
It takes time to get to know someone. Especially when you’re looking for long-term. I have time and can’t figure out how to date. So let me know if you find the secret lol
So . . . fellow 60-80 hour a week person here.
I disagree that you don’t have any time to date, but you’ll need to prioritize it. Set and manage expectations. Make sure you’re making time on Fridays through Sunday lunchtime for dates (I’m assuming you spend Sunday evening getting ready for Monday work). Answer texts in a timely fashion, even if you do it while you’re in the bathroom or while waiting for a cup of coffee.
Are you on dating apps?
Just pick someone and be real. Have strong boundaries both hard and soft. Known yourself more than know what you want. You will never betray you. Mistakes will happen, but be confident
Well, just like other millionaires, if you don’t want to spend time finding someone worth dating, just pay for it. You’re not going to get true desire from them since it’s transactional but at least it’s low effort.