I have been told I am blunt a lot, and I also notice I lack tact(based on how people react). Some times I get told I’m very direct and I guess they all mean the same thing depending on how the recipient perceives it. The thing is I don’t intend to hurt people’s feelings and I don’t understand why people are offended some times(although some times I absolutely do not care if people’s feelings gets hurt, it’s pretty situational, if you’re being an a-hole I have no problem hurting your feelings).
As an example, I got a tattoo and it took me a while to get used to and I wasn’t sure if I liked it for a bit. I love the tattoo but was unsure about the placement, and I know it’s pretty normal/common for people to second guess their tattoo after getting it. I waited for a bit to re-assess my thoughts on it, and I absolutely love it now(I have a good amount and it’s one of my favourites). I went back to the same artist because I love their work and the conversation prompted me to comment on me liking the tattoo, although I wasn’t sure about it for a bit, and explained that it’s pretty normal for that to happen based on research. The artist seemed somewhat offended, said no one has ever said they didn’t like their work, and joked to a colleague about me not liking their tattoo and made other jokes about it. Even thinking back on it, I am not sure what went wrong in the way I conveyed it, but I didn’t want them to think I didn’t like their work(and I tried to provide assurance that I did like their work).
Some times people seem to appreciate the clumsiness in my wording and bluntness and perceive it as funny, witty, etc but also at the same time I can’t turn it off and wish I could communicate better without offending people or hurting their feelings. Any advice?