I have "made new friends"* (some of whom were old and reconnected with). I can have good conversations with them. But it's always me initiating them. That's fine because I'm the one who shoved my way back into the lives of several 30-somethings.
But how do you go from being someone who people are happy to hear from to someone who people reach out to talk to? I'm ok at making acquaintances, like with people at work. But if I put myself out there what do I do to make that more likely to happen?
I'm not suggesting I change who I am intrinsically, or lie about my interests. I'm overweight, boring, and nerdy. There are thriving communities that welcome people like that. How do you find them and how do you incorporate yourself in one?