I'm in my early 30's and I really don't want to be here anymore. I've been in therapy and taking meds since I was a kid. I have grown and learned things, but I'm still a complete failure. I'm not in shape and struggle to get there. I can start a routine but never keep it. As a result I've really dug myself into an extremely deep hole. My self-esteem is non-existent. I don't have a good job or money saved. I don't really have a social life or friends, either. Being around my family is just embarrassing.
I know I need to fix all of this but I'm exhausted and don't have the energy or drive to continue trying. I feel like such a waste of space. I'm sorry to complain so much, I just don't really have someone to talk to like this outside of therapy so it helps to get it out. Is there anything that helped you? (Yes, I know I need to go to the gym/workout…that is my biggest struggle…yes, I have tried short daily walks, too)