Men in long-term relationships — have you ever experienced a surprising shift in your partner’s interest in sex (more frequent or enthusiastic) later in the relationship? What changed, and how did it affect your connection?

EDIT: I’m a woman posting about this. I’m very, very happy in my relationship and this has increased our bond (and honestly, my understanding of him)—just wondering about men’s experiences with this.

I’m curious to hear from men who are married to or in a long term relationship with a woman and actually have experienced her sex drive increasing and how it’s changed/improved their relationship.

I’ve (35F) been with my SO (35M) since college (no kids/childfree). He has always been high libido with me being pretty middle range, but definitely lower than his. Something shifted in the past few months and I literally feel like I have the sex drive of a teenage boy… it’s very distracting.

The level of enthusiasm, kinkiness, and obviously, frequency of sex has shifted considerably. He is very, very happy about this but also kind of like stunned (as am I) because I’m matching his interest and am willing and interested in just about all of his kinks that were previously off the table because of me, which I now feel badly about.

So I’m curious how many men have experienced this in their relationship…

• ⁠How old was your SO? Was it age related or something else that led to the sudden uptick in sex drive?
• ⁠How did it shift your relationship and/or improve it?
• ⁠Were you able to open up more about fantasies or kinks that previously wouldn’t have been acted upon and how did that go?

I feel like I have so much more understanding and empathy for him. Since this shift, he has only rejected me once (my first time ever being rejected in my life) and I’m not kidding, I started having tears well up in my eyes involuntarily lol.

Anyways, any stories, tips, or advice welcome! I’m going to be making up for lost time with him now 🙂

Also—for what it’s worth—I’m happy to answer any questions from men who are with someone with lower libido bc I’ve got to say, a lot of the ways my SO thought he was communicating with me were not getting through and connecting with me and that has been super interesting to see differently now.

TL; DR: Anyone in a long term relationship with a woman who had a big increase in sex drive years into their relationship/marriage?