37 M , married for 8 years. Our marriage is love cum arranged, meaning we didn’t date for long but did for good 1 year or so and then tied knots.
We have a 1 yr kid now who is the apple of our eyes. We both have different interests and communication style. I am the one who has been constantly patching up after every fight. I see my partner as emotionally weak. She is introvert, overthinks, overreacts.
Over the years , I have tried to adapt and improve on my comms. I have been raised by a loving family which is why I understand the value of giving one to my kid in whatever way possible. She on the other hand has been an orphan from a very young age, and is more of someone who gives up on everything.
I am no where perfect or super romantic but I am not bad to understand others emotion and am actively listening to every thing she says. She on the other one, gives me an impression of someone who isn’t analyzing things well and repeats very same things we agreed/ discussed.Has a very bad temper and super egoist. She can feel touchy every now and then.
I can characterize her as someone victimizing herself over lil things, getting defensive without taking learnings, don’t actively seek improvement tips, extremely specific on each and every thing related to her and ours.
She has openly mentioned she no longer loves me, but I can see she caring a lot. But we haven’t had sex since she conceived , as she isn’t interested. I of late also am not liking the bitter/negative person she is becoming. Like focusing only on things not going well or appreciative of my efforts( though I am not looking/care abt appreciation, but it’s not a trait I like in people in complaining mode). It has started giving me stress and impacts my work.
I categorize myself as a happy go lucky kind of person, forgiving and just happy. But I do tend to repeat myself with probably a hope the other person is listening/learning.
I am a problem solver and hate to be giver. But at the same time I want to give our son the best life, like I have been bestowed upon as my utmost responsibility.
P.S – She does care about our son deeply so parenting isn’t the biggest issue.