Let me start off by saying I love my husband deeply. We’ve been together for over 10 years and have a 3 year old together. Hes my best friend and love of my life.
But I cant sleep next to him. I’ve always always struggled with sleeping next to people. On vacations as a kid I remember barely sleeping, tossing and turning, and sleeping opposite from my sister – my entire family snored. I hated sleeping together in a room so much, I never wanted to go on vacations just for that reason. And I’m not the type of person who can operate on no sleep.
For a while in the beginning of our relationship, I thought it was cute my husband snored. I would deal with sleepless nights because I loved cuddling and him snoring and I dealt with the exhaustion the next day. And eventually I did sleep but it was because we smoked weed every night and had a very loud AC unit in our apartment bedroom.
Then we moved to our current house where there is no loud fans or anything, and I get terrible sleeps. I kick him more often because of his snoring, and nothing I do helps. I can still hear him through ear plugs, white noise machines dont help. He doesnt have sleep apnea, he just snores with his mouth closed on top of it.
What really made it worse is me going through postpartum. The times I could sleep and he snored, I would get so angry with him. I turned into an even lighter sleeper because we had a baby. It turned into us sleeping separately so we could both operate and we both get much better sleeps. He says he still sleeps well but I feel awful hes sleeping on the couch every night. The only time I can sleep is if I take a sleeping pill, so that even if I do wake up I’m drowsy enough to fall back asleep easier. But I cant do that forever. I just have so much anxiety about sleeping together now, if we do try sleeping together I just end up lying there and thinking too much about him starting to snore, or kicking around abruptly and scaring me, or something that I cant sleep at all.
I do love having the bedroom to myself and getting good sleeps every night because otherwise I wouldnt be able to function, but I dont want this to be forever.
Anyone else who has gone through this, I’d appreciate any and all advice!!
Tl;dr: Husband snores and we sleep separately so I feel bad but idk what else to do about it.