My boyfriend (M27) and I (F23) have been together for 11 months but we never had sex during our relationship because he was a virgin. Tonight – he decided that he will lose his virginity to me so he bought some condoms and after a long talk he initiated intercourse.
Everything was good at first and he was hard, then at one point, I told him if he wants me to go to doggy style and he said yes and then he started to loudly gag when I turned around into the position, like really loud and gagged a lot and I told him “what are these noises?” and got so terrified and quickly went back under the cover and hid my body. Then he sat and he was soft and told me to continue but I said I wanna stop and then he said why and got really mad and I said I really don’t want to continue.
(In my head I was overthinking everything – I already had pressure to perform well because I was his first and when he gagged so much I got so scared that I smelled bad or my privates look ugly or he saw something repulsive so I got so scared and stopped. I was so embarrassed of myself)
After this he got really mad and said that “you just took my virginity and now this is how you act” and I just cried and cried and I tried to hug him and stuff but he was really upset.
I went home and communicated by text why I stopped and then he told me that he gagged because it smelled so bad and he said he knows it was not me because when he went home chat gpt said condom and semen smell bad together and it was the smell of the condom mixed with his semen that made him gag.
I feel so embarrassed and I feel like I just want to cry and hide from him because how embarrassed I feel. In the past hour he has blown up my phone telling me not to be embarrassed but I just can’t bring myself to respond to him and the only thing I’ve told him is that I need some space because i feel so disgusted by myself. I have had sex with men before and I have never come across the issue of smell to the point where a man gags so audibly.
I don’t know if this helps but my boyfriend is a dentist so he is used to seeing gross things and smelling bad smells – hence why I am so taken back by him gagging because of the smell.
Any advice as to how to approach this situation? I really don’t know how to move forward with this 😞 I really wanted his first time to be something special, not something disgusting..
TL;DR – boyfriend gagged during intercourse with me, now I feel insecure and embarrassed and don’t know how to move forward