I had a child five years before I met my husband. We have been together for five years and married for two years. He loves my son and accepts him as his own. My baby daddy has been unwillingly paying court-mandated child support and has refused to have any relationship with his son, and that's okay. I decided years ago that I would save the CS money until my son is 18. Over the years, I have only touched some of the money (never more than 10% at a time) as a last resort. This is primarily because I do not see the money as mine. My BD is an unwilling participant, and the payment can stop if anything happens to him or he leaves the country.
Anyway, my husband's car recently broke down beyond repair, and he needs a new one. He doesn't want to take out a car loan because of the high interest, so he suggested I loan him the entire amount in the savings account to use for a new car. And he will pay it back before our son turns 18.
He got angry when I refused, saying I was being unreasonable because the money was just sitting in the account and not being used.
I reminded him that I bought a car 4 months ago, put down a 40% deposit from my personal account and took out a car loan to pay 60% of the balance. I asked why he thought I didn't just use that money.
He is very angry with me now and said I'm being irrational.
I do not doubt he will pay back the loan in the next 8 years as promised. However, life is unpredictable, and I can't risk it; that money is for my boy's future and our safety net. I was a young mom and my boy and I were once broke and homeless for 2 years. It was a long time ago, but that feeling stays with you. Funny enough, I met my husband a few months after I crawled out of that situation, secured my first job and rented our first home.
He plans to put down a £6000 deposit from his savings, so I suggested he buy a car within that price range, but he refused. He wants a good family car that is less than 5 years old and such a car doesn't come cheap.
I need advice. How can I make him see reason? I don't want this argument to escalate.
Note: He is currently using my car for his work commute.