I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year. We have a wonderful relationship, and I love him very much. However, recently we have felt a little distant from each other. He admitted he has been less affectionate, but doesn't know why. I have also felt we've been more like friends than partners. We did have his child stay with us for an extended period which changed the dynamics of how we would usually be, and this may have had an impact on how we behaved. My view was that although our intimacy reduced, it's a good thing we still got along and enjoyed each other's company – friendship is the bedrock of a good relationship. His was that not having sex shouldn't change how close we feel to each other and that this was the case might indicate we aren't right for each other. We have reconnected intimately since that conversation which is great. But I still have this nagging feeling he is staying with me because he doesn't want another failed relationship rather than because of love (when we spoke, he also expressed disappointment that we may not have found our happiness with each other and this could be another failed relationship). I never thought he'd feel that way, and what he said is playing on my mind even though we seem okay now. Now every look, every comment, every touch is subject to me wondering if he really loves me or is just going through the motions.
I have spoken with him since, and he says everything is good now. But I just can't shake the feeling he is staying through a sense of obligation and because other than the issues with connection we are a great couple who is very involved with each other's families etc.
Are my feelings valid, or is this just a normal stage couples go through when transitioning from honeymoon period to 'real' relationship?
I've not had any really healthy relationships in the past so I feel like I don't know how to identify the difference between new phase to be worked through versus relationship has run its course.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.