The dating scene has gotten so bad that my ex is looking great right now! He was my first love and I was his first real relationship. I envisioned a life for us, but I was devastated when I found out he cheated. He took accountability and tried for a year to win me back. Wrote me letters everyday and eventually sent them and I could tell how much he actually loved me, but yet I didn’t budge. Everyone in my life knew what he did and I know how much it’s looked down upon to go back to someone who hurt you that deeply. Plus I felt as if I deserved better than someone who would do that, which I definitely did.
But now, I don’t think there are men out there who wouldn’t cheat or haven’t cheated in their past, even on people they truly did love. At least he took accountability and has emotional intelligence unlike most of the narcissistic men that I keep running into these days. It’s so hard to find people who actually want to get to know you for who you really are and not some narrative that they have of you, or keep you around for whatever benefits and feel no remorse or guilt or shame. I’m losing hope in humanity and my ex is now looking great in my eyes. We talked recently, and he started crying within a few minutes saying it was the biggest mistake of his life, and I never did stop loving him. It’s been almost 5 years now since we broke up.
Has anyone else felt this way? Or is it just me? I feel like the dating scene has gotten so bad. And yeah I’m not actually going to get back with him, I’m okay with being single rather than with the wrong person. It just feels like if I were to ultimately want a partner that that’s my best option. Which is crazy!