What does “healthy” porn consumption look like to you? And is there such thing?

38 comments

1. It’s just like any other potential vice which may cause issues. There’s people who drink, use drugs recreationally, gamble; but it doesn’t interfere in a maladaptive way with their lives. Porn is the same. Some people can use it, some can’t.

2. I watch it sometimes when my gf is out of town. Could go without it forever I think that is healthy.

3. Never looking at it

4. Why not? If it’s not interfering with anything else, go for it. No need to clutch your pearls.

5. Look for warning signs… doing it often when you are bored or stressed, or while your partner is home and willing… getting into weird, fringe stuff and choosing it over real-life options.

6. Just like there is no healthy amount of alcohol consumption, there is no healthy amount of porn consumption. That said some people to enjoy the occasional drink on certain occasions and in moderation but it isn’t disrupting their work, relationships, or health… at least not in a major way. Is it good, no. Is it an addiction, also no.

7. Can you get off by yourself without it? 👍🏼

   Can you find something on the front page of the website that will do the trick? 👍🏼

   Can you get off to vanilla porn? 👍🏼

   Are you still able to carry on a healthy sex life with an actual person? 👍🏼

   If the answer to all those questions is yes, I don’t see an issue. If it’s no, then you’re somewhere on a slippery slope. Maybe not at the bottom where you’ll never have a healthy sexual relationship without significant help, but somewhere on the slope for sure.

8. Erm..

   I’m sure it’s a thing but there are a lot of complexities. If I’m not getting any with anyone then I’ll have a browse and spank one out. I don’t pay for it, I’m not a virgin, and I’m secure enough not to compare myself to the guy with an enormous penis.

   You could call that healthy consumption.

   The unhealthy component(I guess) comes from unrealistic expectations, a partner that you’re not attracted to, erectile dysfunction, lack of confidence, or just being plain ugly.

   Who the fuck knows.

9. I jerk off all the time. I also have a wife and family, a job, and many real responsibilities.

   As long as you manage your life then it doesn’t matter.

10. Once or twice a week, if needed. My sex drive is high than my wife’s. And if she’s not ready and it’s been a while, sometimes I need that release. When it’s been to long I can tell I get irritated quicker.

11. It is unhealthy when other things suffer from it. When you have to look at porn to get by its an addiction. When you don’t do other things in life because porn is priority then its a problem.

12. I think it probably affects us more than we think, even if taken in moderation. I’m not one of those people who thinks it’s all automatically 100% bad, or that believes in ‘nofap’, but I made a conscious choice to stop watching it a few years ago and I’m happier for it.

    The main issue I have with it is our modern delivery system. I think the tube sites are ridiculously over-stimulating and have a high addiction potential due to the endless novelty and availability.

    I think healthy porn consumption today would look more like what porn consumption was in the past. An occasional little kinky thing that you dust of from the back of the closet every once in a rare while. And I mean anything more than monthly is potentially problematic.

    And I think that a lot of people are lying to themselves about the impacts of porn on their sex lives and relationships.

13. Chiming in to collect my downvotes alongside the other guys who say there’s no such thing. It’s bad for your brain, it’s bad for your soul, it’s bad for everyone involved in making it, and it’s bad for society.

14. I won’t relate my whole life history, but I think for certain men with certain external circumstances I think the answer is none.

    My issues with sex and relationships is complex, but porn did me no favors. I honestly wonder what my life would have been like without porn, but my other issues still present. My sexual relationship with my wife is also complex and not healthy so that makes it hard too.

15. If it distorts your view of sex irl; affects your day to day or you’re unable to maintain normal sexual function as a result, I’d say it’s unhealthy.

    There’s genuinely people out there distraught at the Online Safety Act making it difficult for them to fap anonymously.

    I’d say that’s more than a tad unhealthy.

16. I am someone who is currently trying to quit altogether. I have an “All in” personality so I don’t know why I am shocked it’s taken me this long to discover how addicted I am.

17. I’m always interested in other peoples comments for this.

    My sex drive/desire is still the same as I was as a teenager. When I want to get that fix if my wife is down 100% want it with her. Of course she’s not always down. I can take care of that fix pretty easy and quick with tube sites. I avoid the cam sites because I found myself watching longer. I never spent money but I absolutely see how that kind of porn is an addiction

    I feel like as long as you don’t desire the videos before your spouse I think it’s considered healthy.

18. Just watch some footage to bust a nut. Most other efforts are superfluous.

19. healthy : stopping at page 3

    unhealthy : stopping at page 3000

20. If it doesn’t negatively impact anything else in your daily life, it’s not a problem. For example, if you are otherwise educated, employed, physically fit, have hobbies, and have a decent social group, but cant find a willing sexual partner, jerking off every day isn’t a problem, now is it?

    Also, even as far as solo passive entertainment goes, I thinks its fine. I dont like reality TV, but I dont fault people for watching it. Porn just usually isnt conventionally acceptable group entertainment.

21. To encourage discussion, can we also respect the comments who say “not at all”. It might be worth asking why they say this – ie lived experience etc – instead of just down voting immediately 🙏🙏🙏🙏

22. Any vice be it drugs, alcohol, or porn/sex is unhealthy in excess.

    Any behavior, even the “healthy” ones, are unhealthy in excess.

    Moderation is key. That will vary with the end user.

23. Using it to masturbate and then turning it off when you’re done? Totally healthy.

    Binge-watching it like you’re watching the entire Stranger Things series on a Saturday? Yeah that’s not healthy.

    Basically like anything else, it’s all about moderation. Doing anything obsessively is generally not viewed upon as healthy. Even a simple hobby like wood-working. Totally healthy, nothing really twisted about that, right? Sure, until you start calling out of work to do more wood-working, start ignoring your significant other, your kids, your friends, until all you care about from the time you wake up until it’s time for bed, you’re doing your hobby.

    Once something takes over your attention, your life, etc., then it becomes a problem.

24. As a conservative Christian man, my answer is zero.

25. I find that my sex life is better if I consume porn in moderation. Too much makes me desensitized to normal sex, but too little leaves me distracted and low-key crazy for sex. I use porn just enough to keep my sexual appetite and fantasies balanced and inspired.

    The important thing is to have the self awareness and honesty to recognize when it affects your sexual life negatively, and the desire and discipline to then adjust accordingly.

26. After 10 years in my relationship, it’s really easy for me to enjoy porn more and more and my partner less and less.

    and at 41, let’s just say I can’t jerk off and also want to have sex like I could in my 20’s and 30’s.

    So here is what I do:

    I only watch porn on my SO’s period.

27. There is no healthy way to engage with Porn.
    The industry itself is horrible.

28. I don’t think there is such thing as “healthy” porn consumption. It is a super stimulator to your dopamine center.

29. I think a good policy is: If it takes you longer to find a suitable video than it will to have a wank, that is a sign to reel it back.

30. Health porn consumption is Porn consumption that doesn’t have a negative impact on your sex life or impact your day to day (IE make you late for work because you’re watching porn all day kind of thing).

31. None. Stay away.

32. If it doesn’t affect other aspects of your life….then it’s healthy.

    myself, don’t have a partner, so what if I watch 10 minutes of porn and whack off to it before going to bed every other night? no one is being harmed by it.

33. If it’s not “unhealthy” it’s fine. Look for typical signs of addiction.

    Inability to perform sexually unless watching porn. Stopping other productive and rewarding things in your life by watching porn. ED or inability to climax without porn. Inability to go through a day without watching porn. Depressive/anxiety symptoms when not consuming porn for a period of time.

    Also, if it’s affecting normal and healthy sexual relationships in ways that hurt the overall relationship (as opposed to “why don’t we try this cool thing I saw”) then it’s unhealthy.

34. I’ve been seeing a lot of discourse about this lately, and I kind of find it odd.

    My brother and I found our dad’s stash of playboys when I was like 10, and while my parents didn’t love learning that we had gotten into them, they also weren’t so closed-off so as to pretend they didn’t have a sex life, or that my dad did enjoy girlie magazines, so to me, porn has never been this taboo thing that was unhealthy.

    I feel like some of this discourse is rooted in Christian puritanical thinking. Enjoying sex is a healthy part of life, and porn can absolutely be a part of that. So long as you remember/abide these things, I think you’re good:
    1) Porn is performance. It rarely depicts real sex, and IRL good sex rarely looks like porn sex.
    2) Porn is not a proper substitute for actual intimate relationships.
    3) Porn should never be a priority. If it starts getting in the way of your work, friendships, or familial duties, you’re in too far.

35. Would you still consider it “watching porn” if it’s a video of you and your significant other?

36. 8x a day, weird and crazy stuff only. But no masturbation you have control the urge and never ever cum.

    Anything more than that is a bit edgy

37. I watch porn and jack off almost every day and sometimes more than once, usually at most 3 or 4 times but thats rare.

    I have a high sex drive. I can Jack off first thing in the morning and then have sex multiple times after, one doesn’t kill my appetite for the other.

    I have a healthy sex life, a good occupational life, and a social life , solo hobbies I do etc.

    Porn affects everybody differently. One person’s healthy level of consumption doesn’t have much of a bearing on another’s.

    Alot of men feel shame after self love, but I’ve never felt that at all. Some men will use porn and Jack off once a month and feel like they’re ruining their lives. I think problematic use of porn can be thought of as similar to other problematic uses of other vices, that is when you give up other activities you enjoy to engage in the vice, you stop seeing friends and family and significant others to have more time to engage in it, you can’t hold down a job or start failing school etc.

    Most people’s porn use doesn’t reach those levels. It’s also important to consider were talking about a biological drive. It’s pretty hard not to satiate those drives. I don’t think anyone should feel ashamed for getting themselves off when they feel the need, whether they use porn or not

38. If porn didn’t exist right now, men wouldn’t be so silent and docile about the dating scene being as broke as it is. We’d be out in the streets ripping shit apart (or just not doing our jobs) until a solution was made. Porn is what’s stopping that from happening.