I (30M) have been in a relationship with (33F) for about 3 months now. She has two children who are really good kids and I don’t have children. Our relationship is going fantastic, we don’t fight, we don’t neglect one another in any ways, we communicate well and my relationship with her children have blossomed really well. Everything is going great and bonds are strong.
Even though I’m in this very healthy and stable relationship, I still feel nervous and on guard. My divorce was the best thing that has ever happened to me, changed me as a man (for the better) in every way, lost a bunch of weight, rekindled relationships, found new hobbies, etc. but it left me with a lingering feeling of distrust. My wife left me for reasons I don’t fully know and I agree that we didn’t belong together but regardless, it fucking hurt.
Even though my girlfriend has been absolutely wonderful and our lives together have blossomed beautifully, I always have the thought in the back of my mind “what if she leaves me too?” She has done nothing to deserve my reservations, it’s 100% a me thing. I love her and the kids deeply and I want to be with them so I’d like to understand what I’m feeling better if I’m able. I’m just wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences? If so, what was the resolution if there was one?
To add:
I’ve been seeing a therapist ever since the divorce and it has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I’ve spoke with her about this and it’s helped but I still like getting other peoples perspectives.