My (38F) husband (38M) is seriously micromanaging/critical. Today I was the cash register and in his opinion taking too long to order coffee. And then I was taking too long to choose which bagels I was getting. He was saying there was a line of FIVE PEOPLE behind me. He was saying how HARD is it to pick what coffee I wanted and how people in the line were possibly being held up by me. Im sorry, but the shop could have opened up another register. I truly do not feel like I was taking that long to order in the first place. I am sorry if I "caused" anyone any inconvenience but at the same time, I was in line first why do I need to cater to strangers to the lengths it's going to cause a rift in my marriage by not "rushing" fast enough for some random strangers? I was simply standing in front on the case and picking out the bagels. I ordered 12 so yes, it took a minute to tell the girl which ones I wanted and for her to put them in the box.
Last week, my daughter's 10 year old friend left her little purse with a few dollars at our house and I forgot to bring it to an event they were going to be at the next day. That turned into another huge ordeal with him. About how I "always" forget stuff, and "if it was in the car then why was it brought back in the house???" (I was cleaning out car and mistakenly brought it in with random stuff for the car) and in my mind I'm just thinking…is it really worth a huge rift/ yelling argument between us over a kids item that THEY forgot. Or because someone had to wait behind me in line ? But yep, that's a hill he was willing to die on for some reason. By yelling argument I mean he raised his voice and goes off and I just sit there… I am not yelling back.
Tl, Dr: husband is micromanaging and being critical over every little action and having huge meltdowns on me over things I don't think need to be that serious. He doesn't realize how this pushes me away.