Otherwise, me and my boyfriend have an amazing relationship. We’ve been together for two years and I do think he really loves me and we are planning to get married in next few years.
However, sometimes I feel like i’m putting in a lot more effort and i feel a little under appreciated. It was our anniversary last week and I really went all out as much as I could. I made him a really romantic candle-lit dinner with all his favorites, steak and his favorite sides, I also made him his favorite dessert. Also I made him a memory book of us, bought him a button-up shirt and wrote a letter expressing my love. Obviously all this took a lot of time, effort and money, and he was really touched and said he really liked everything.
Later, when we went to his place my present was just sitting on his desk, it wasn’t even packed nicely and it seemed like he didn’t really put any effort at all. It was something for a hobby that we do together. What threw me off a little is when he said: “I bought you, well I bought US this …” Also, he knows I don’t have time for our hobby right now, and probably won’t till next summer. But he also got me beautiful flowers.
I feel really bad that I feel this way, but it seems to me like I put in so much more thought into his presents and my main goal was to get him something he likes, whereas he got me something he enjoys doing, that I won’t even be able to do for some time.
This isn’t the first time this happened, for our last anniversary I did even more, and he didn’t really put a lot of effort, so I thought this year maybe would be different but I guess not.
I don’t know how to talk to him, I don’t want to sound ungrateful and I don’t want to hurt him as I love him dearly. But all this is making me feel stupid and a little pathetic for trying so hard when he isn’t matching my energy.
Also, I don’t think it’s a money issue since he has no problem spending a lot of money on himself.
Is it unreasonable of me to feel this way?
TL;DR I once again put in a lot more effort than my boyfriend and I feel sad