I(20) female have been dating my current partner male(21) for a few months now almost a year. When we meet you al know how it starts with the honey moon phase and all. As we got to know each other more we of course got closer and opened up to one another. But I came into the relationship healed and available emotionally. He on the other hand seems to have came in the opposite. Broken and emotionally unavailable. Like any other couple he have had out differences and we have had our share fair of fights and arguments. Ive tried to help and understand but the more I do the more I lose myself in the process. He recently left the US to achieve or follow his dreams in Spain. Which I truly support but ever since he left, he got drier, messages seem more of like a reply rather then trying to have a conversation. Of course it's not easy with the time zones and the commitments he has there. Ive been understanding by far these last 2 weeks and a half but I also communicate my feelings and what's wrong with his doing that affects me. He tries to acknowledge me but shuts down more than half of the time. Saying he's just not god enough at communicating long distance or I deserve better because he sucks or he's a bad bf. Which in my pov I understand why he says those things or why he acts a certain way. But the more I understand I feel like the more he takes advantage of me. Not because he might not love me but because he has never had someone like me and he doesn't know how to treat me. But I firmly believe that when you love you try, yore intense. And dealing with someone who isn't emotionally available is sublimely hard. Cause I understand yet I don't. It has cost me a lot, I've been questioning a lot of things in our relationship. There's been times that I feel the need to look for the things he's not giving me somewhere else. But I don't want to cheat neither do I want to leave because after all we just two imperfect humans trying to love.
TL;DR
My current partner male(21) and me female (20), have had a rough time with his unavailability dealing with emotions and i'm having a hard time figuring out how to go about it.