How is watching porn viewed in relationships—cheating or not?
June 25, 2025
I’ve read some subreddits that say watching pornography is cheating. Do you watch porn and do you allow your partner to watch porn?
26 comments
we both watch porn and browse nsfw twitter/reddit
i don’t consider it cheating unless there’s one-on-one conversations happening with actresses
No, I don’t think watching porn is considered cheating. I watch it too from time to time.
But how can I even stop my partner from watching it? That’s sounds toxic to me. People do what they want to do anyway. 🤷♀️
I personally dont think its cheating, moreso of just a relaxation or release tactic.
Personally I don’t believe porn is healthy to consume while in a relationship. I don’t watch porn although I used to watch it a lot. I won’t date someone who actively consumes it. I usually make that known very early on as I don’t want to be lied to about it later down the line.
I don’t think it’s as bad as cheating but it’s no better than lusting after others and getting sexual gratification from others. You can easily say “it’s not real, it’s porn” but that’s objectifying the people in the videos. It is real and they are real people.
personally, my boyfriend & I don’t watch porn, & i don’t encourage it for numerous reasons, most important ofc being that i’m the only woman he should jerk off too, anyone else feels weird to me🤷🏻♀️
No it’s not cheating!
It’s not cheating, but it’s a problem.
I’ve never and will never think it’s cheating. We’re both “allowed” to watch it but he literally never does unless we’re watching it together.
It depends on your relationship. Either way, it’s proven to hurt relationships more than help.
I was first exposed to it around age 12 and watched semi regularly since my teen years until 1-2 years ago. It wasn’t until I learned more about how damaging it is and was hurt by it in my own relationship that I stopped. When you’ve been exposed in literal childhood, the world is so overly sexualized, and porn is so normalized (normalized does not = healthy or good) you become desensitized. If it hurts you in a relationship we’re told “that’s a YOU problem! You’re just insecure!” I’ve seen so many women, like myself, push down their feelings on it because they feel like they HAVE to accept their partner getting off to other women. You don’t! It’s not unfair at all to ask that your partner don’t seek out and cum to other ladies. Masturbation is great, use your imagination or pics of your partner if they’re cool with providing.
If you’ve agreed to a monogamous relationship, to me personally, that means reserving lust and sexuality for your partner, virtually too. Not everyone has to agree but for me sex is about intimacy, love, bonding, connection. Very sad how we’ve turned it into a business deal, a swipe, a transaction. Loyalty is rare, people complain they can’t find love, but everyone is out here settling for cheap imitations.
I don’t consider it cheating, but I would not want a partner that watches porn and I don’t watch it myself either. The industry is rife with exploitation, trafficking and misogyny. Even if you only visit mainstream sites you very well might have seen women and girls get raped. And even with stuff like onlyfans you never know what is going on in the background. For something as superfluous as porn I think you should just go the safe bet and not consume it at all instead of betting on whoever you’re watching not being exploited in some way.
Don’t consider it cheating. We watch it together!
Everyone’s relationships are different. I have heard from some of my girl friends who don’t like their partner watching porn, were often cheated on in past relationships. So, while I don’t agree, I understand why they might feel that way.
Totally dependent on the person you are asking. It is really something couples should talk about. Way too many people leave it unspoken like its common sense that porn is ok or not.
For some it is cheating. That is a discussion to be had with that person and you need to determine if it works with your views on it.
Personally I don’t mind porn. Yeah he can watch porn, play dirty video games, touch himself. I just have some boundaries about it that I explicitly talk about.
Don’t let it harm you or us. Dont let it reach addiction, don’t do illegal stuff, don’t do it so much you injure yourself, etc.
No interaction with another person. No erotic rp, no entering chat on Webcam shows, no strip clubs, no Instagram follows or sexting. You can watch videos, cam girls, read dirty stuff, play dirty solo player games, look at pictures. Just no interacting with another person. Also no dating ai….have to add this one in now apparently.
I think I am pretty reasonable with my boundaries and I don’t mind looking at porn as a couples bonding activity either. It is all about communication of expectations and boundaries.
If you are doing erotic rp online, yeah I consider that cheating because I said no interacting with other people in a sexual or pornagraphic manner.
I don’t think it’s cheating but I don’t watch porn. It would be ideal to find a man who also doesn’t watch porn but I think the majority do. I have no problem with masturbation.
If both people agree that something is ok, then it isn’t cheating. With porn or really anything.
I think it’s weird. The whole point of it is to arouse you into self-pleasuring. That’s because there’s a deficiency in your life, whether it’s relationship, sex, intimacy or whatever. When you have a partner who soothes all those cravings, what’s the point of watching porn? It’s not as bad as cheating, but idk it’s just weird to me.
I 100% consider it a form of cheating and would terminate the relationship promptly if I discovered he was watching it.
I think it depends on you… if your partner views it as cheating then it is cheating to them…
I personally don’t care… we are also in an ethical non monogamous relationship… so take that with a grain of salt.
Yes to both. In my view, people who think it’s cheating are insecure.
I wouldn’t consider it cheating per say, but the fact that my partner would be willing to view content that depicts the abuse and degradation of women would be the primary reason it’s a no from me. As someone who has been raped it makes me sick to think that my man would get off to a video depicting a similar scenario.
It is not cheating unless you are interacting with them, like OnlyFans.
(Just my opinion. I am a woman, and both myself and my husband watch porn occasionally)
The true answer is that “cheating” is whatever you and your partner agree to define as cheating for the purposes of your particular relationship. If you’re not sure what your partner considers to be cheating, you should ask them, because that’s important to know.
For myself personally, I would never consider watching porn to be cheating, for the same reason I don’t consider it to be cheating when a partner masturbates, reads erotica, sexually fantasizes, watches mainstream movies that have nudity in them, etc.
My boyfriend and I don’t care if the other watches porn
It’s absolutely cheating. My husband and I have an agreement that if either of us ever consumed that shit it’s grounds for divorce.
It depends on the couple, but my husband and I have always looked at it as cheating. It’s not just the serial pleasure at watching someone else, there’s also a raft of other ethical issues with it. Porn often negatively affects how you experience sex with your spouse, causing you to make negative comparisons or find it boring compared to what 2 professionals can do on a set. Porn consumers are also engaging in perpetuating an industry that harms the people who work in it, which is often very exploitative.
i don’t think it’s cheating but unhealthy and it shows lack of respect for your partner. unless you both are okay with it then congrats but i could never be with someone who openly tells me that he watches other women naked and enjoys it even thinking about it makes me feel sick. but maybe its because of “trauma” ive been through when i told my ex i just don’t want him to do that and he still watched it when he was alone and hid it from me for a long time after our several conversations that im not okay with it
26 comments
we both watch porn and browse nsfw twitter/reddit
i don’t consider it cheating unless there’s one-on-one conversations happening with actresses
No, I don’t think watching porn is considered cheating. I watch it too from time to time.
But how can I even stop my partner from watching it? That’s sounds toxic to me. People do what they want to do anyway. 🤷♀️
I personally dont think its cheating, moreso of just a relaxation or release tactic.
Personally I don’t believe porn is healthy to consume while in a relationship. I don’t watch porn although I used to watch it a lot. I won’t date someone who actively consumes it. I usually make that known very early on as I don’t want to be lied to about it later down the line.
I don’t think it’s as bad as cheating but it’s no better than lusting after others and getting sexual gratification from others. You can easily say “it’s not real, it’s porn” but that’s objectifying the people in the videos. It is real and they are real people.
personally, my boyfriend & I don’t watch porn, & i don’t encourage it for numerous reasons, most important ofc being that i’m the only woman he should jerk off too, anyone else feels weird to me🤷🏻♀️
No it’s not cheating!
It’s not cheating, but it’s a problem.
I’ve never and will never think it’s cheating. We’re both “allowed” to watch it but he literally never does unless we’re watching it together.
It depends on your relationship. Either way, it’s proven to hurt relationships more than help.
I was first exposed to it around age 12 and watched semi regularly since my teen years until 1-2 years ago. It wasn’t until I learned more about how damaging it is and was hurt by it in my own relationship that I stopped. When you’ve been exposed in literal childhood, the world is so overly sexualized, and porn is so normalized (normalized does not = healthy or good) you become desensitized. If it hurts you in a relationship we’re told “that’s a YOU problem! You’re just insecure!” I’ve seen so many women, like myself, push down their feelings on it because they feel like they HAVE to accept their partner getting off to other women. You don’t! It’s not unfair at all to ask that your partner don’t seek out and cum to other ladies. Masturbation is great, use your imagination or pics of your partner if they’re cool with providing.
If you’ve agreed to a monogamous relationship, to me personally, that means reserving lust and sexuality for your partner, virtually too. Not everyone has to agree but for me sex is about intimacy, love, bonding, connection. Very sad how we’ve turned it into a business deal, a swipe, a transaction. Loyalty is rare, people complain they can’t find love, but everyone is out here settling for cheap imitations.
I don’t consider it cheating, but I would not want a partner that watches porn and I don’t watch it myself either. The industry is rife with exploitation, trafficking and misogyny. Even if you only visit mainstream sites you very well might have seen women and girls get raped. And even with stuff like onlyfans you never know what is going on in the background. For something as superfluous as porn I think you should just go the safe bet and not consume it at all instead of betting on whoever you’re watching not being exploited in some way.
Don’t consider it cheating. We watch it together!
Everyone’s relationships are different. I have heard from some of my girl friends who don’t like their partner watching porn, were often cheated on in past relationships. So, while I don’t agree, I understand why they might feel that way.
Totally dependent on the person you are asking. It is really something couples should talk about. Way too many people leave it unspoken like its common sense that porn is ok or not.
For some it is cheating. That is a discussion to be had with that person and you need to determine if it works with your views on it.
Personally I don’t mind porn. Yeah he can watch porn, play dirty video games, touch himself. I just have some boundaries about it that I explicitly talk about.
Don’t let it harm you or us. Dont let it reach addiction, don’t do illegal stuff, don’t do it so much you injure yourself, etc.
No interaction with another person. No erotic rp, no entering chat on Webcam shows, no strip clubs, no Instagram follows or sexting. You can watch videos, cam girls, read dirty stuff, play dirty solo player games, look at pictures. Just no interacting with another person. Also no dating ai….have to add this one in now apparently.
I think I am pretty reasonable with my boundaries and I don’t mind looking at porn as a couples bonding activity either. It is all about communication of expectations and boundaries.
If you are doing erotic rp online, yeah I consider that cheating because I said no interacting with other people in a sexual or pornagraphic manner.
I don’t think it’s cheating but I don’t watch porn. It would be ideal to find a man who also doesn’t watch porn but I think the majority do. I have no problem with masturbation.
If both people agree that something is ok, then it isn’t cheating. With porn or really anything.
I think it’s weird. The whole point of it is to arouse you into self-pleasuring. That’s because there’s a deficiency in your life, whether it’s relationship, sex, intimacy or whatever. When you have a partner who soothes all those cravings, what’s the point of watching porn? It’s not as bad as cheating, but idk it’s just weird to me.
I 100% consider it a form of cheating and would terminate the relationship promptly if I discovered he was watching it.
I think it depends on you… if your partner views it as cheating then it is cheating to them…
I personally don’t care… we are also in an ethical non monogamous relationship… so take that with a grain of salt.
Yes to both. In my view, people who think it’s cheating are insecure.
I wouldn’t consider it cheating per say, but the fact that my partner would be willing to view content that depicts the abuse and degradation of women would be the primary reason it’s a no from me. As someone who has been raped it makes me sick to think that my man would get off to a video depicting a similar scenario.
It is not cheating unless you are interacting with them, like OnlyFans.
(Just my opinion. I am a woman, and both myself and my husband watch porn occasionally)
The true answer is that “cheating” is whatever you and your partner agree to define as cheating for the purposes of your particular relationship. If you’re not sure what your partner considers to be cheating, you should ask them, because that’s important to know.
For myself personally, I would never consider watching porn to be cheating, for the same reason I don’t consider it to be cheating when a partner masturbates, reads erotica, sexually fantasizes, watches mainstream movies that have nudity in them, etc.
My boyfriend and I don’t care if the other watches porn
It’s absolutely cheating. My husband and I have an agreement that if either of us ever consumed that shit it’s grounds for divorce.
It depends on the couple, but my husband and I have always looked at it as cheating. It’s not just the serial pleasure at watching someone else, there’s also a raft of other ethical issues with it. Porn often negatively affects how you experience sex with your spouse, causing you to make negative comparisons or find it boring compared to what 2 professionals can do on a set. Porn consumers are also engaging in perpetuating an industry that harms the people who work in it, which is often very exploitative.
i don’t think it’s cheating but unhealthy and it shows lack of respect for your partner. unless you both are okay with it then congrats but i could never be with someone who openly tells me that he watches other women naked and enjoys it even thinking about it makes me feel sick. but maybe its because of “trauma” ive been through when i told my ex i just don’t want him to do that and he still watched it when he was alone and hid it from me for a long time after our several conversations that im not okay with it
No, it’s not cheating.