Why are your 30’s SO MUCH better than your 20’s were?
June 21, 2025
Why are your 30’s SO MUCH better than your 20’s were?
27 comments
More money and financial stability, being in an actual field of work, having finished all schooling finally, and having more friends.
My MH is significantly better than it was when I was in my late teens and twenties. While I’ve gained weight, I have more time to go to the gym or for a walk than I did while in college or grad school. Outside work, I can prioritize whatever I want. I like when I leave work (for the most part), I can go home and not do work unlike times when I had homework. I like having PTO to take off days of work and do nothing. I’ve developed more friendships since I was younger. My career is person focused, so I feel like my social skills and ability to feel confident socializing has improved.
My 20’s were horrible! I was diagnosed with epilepsy at 21 and it wasn’t controlled well throughout my 20s. I went to college late and struggle with college thanks to having epilepsy but I finally graduated couple years ago. I couldn’t drive throughout my 20’s which means zero independence and freedom. My relationships were horrible and I now have horrible self-esteem. In my 30’s its like I restarted my life that I never had in my 20s
Confidence from not giving as many fricks.
For me it was because I got a little glow up, gained a ton of confidence, and finally landed my career in lending that I worked my entire 20s to achieve.
For me I cared a lot more about what others thought when I was in my 20’s. I also had a lot of fomo so self care often took a backseat. Having more money and no student loans is also helpful.
That said, I don’t regret how I spent my 20’s. It made me into who I am and I really cherish the memories. You can’t enjoy your 30’s without figuring shit out in your 20’s first.
Cos I knew who I was by the time I hit my 30s
I’m now so much braver, smarter, wiser, and better suited to stand up for myself, acting as my own cheerleader and protector than I was in my 20s.
I don’t feel as unsure.
Escaped abusive parent.
My early 20s were much better
Definitely more money.
More money, better rep in the industry to have a good career, and met enough people to be more confident in myself and not care about what others think. Also better ability to see through people and their intentions.
I am just generally more confident, have a better idea of my interests and boundaries, feel better about my mind and body, know better now to take care of myself mentally and physically, and I finally quit drinking.
My 20s were soooo chaotic. I moved out at 17 to a city far away from my hometown and immediately started acting like a wild animal let out of a cage. Partied and drank a lot, went to raves and did drugs (nothing hardcore thank god, but I’m no stranger to ecstasy and lsd). Had a string of horrible and unhealthy relationships, my mental health was in the toilet, and the cherry on top of the shit cake was when I got diagnosed with cancer at 27! It was a nightmare.
I spent my 20s partying, having a slew of relationships, and genuinely thinking I was living an “exciting” life when really I was suppressing my emotions and trying to run away from my mental health issues.
I honestly think the cancer was what saved me. I realized I needed to get my shit together, because life is so fragile. In my 20s I thought I was invincible, now I’m wise enough to know I’m not special. I broke up with my abusive boyfriend, moved back home with my parents, and started meds and therapy. I practiced living a sober, stable life until it stuck. Sometimes I miss the “Wild days” and look back fondly at those nights where I had so much fun, but I know now that fun comes with a price. So I spend my days working, volunteering, taking care of my health and doing hobbies. I don’t need chaos or wildness or excitement, I need peace. And I’m finding a lot of solace in that in my 30s. So I think it’s definitely going better than my 20s!!
I feel like 20s were the grind. School/work/social life/establishing independence. 30s are a lot of relaxed and enjoying my long-term relationships and life. It’s less anxious and hectic for me.
I’ve just started my 30s and I’d say it’s mainly the feeling of being more settled somewhere. Settled in my career, married to my life partner, a solid group of friends who are staying put for the foreseeable future, home ownership, being part of my local community. I spent my 20s being very transient, jumping between jobs and different cities, making friends who’d disappear after a year because either they moved or I did.
I once saw, “Your 30s are like your 20s, but with money.” And I think that’s true for the most part. But aside from generally being in a better place financially and professionally, you just have more maturity and life experience, so you don’t waste your time and energy on things you shouldn’t and generally make better decisions. So you spend less time dealing with the fallout of bad decisions.
I don’t make the same stupid mistakes that I did in my twenties, but I’m still young. That would be my answer.
Main reason – you stop seeking validation from others and comparing yourself to everyone else.
For me it’s been my kids. Having a kid is Sooooo much work. But it’s absolutely worth it. It breathes new purpose into your life. AND you get to re-experience things through their eyes.
For me, they’re pretty much the same. Nothing has really changed. But i’m also only 34, so I have half a decade of my 30s left.
My 30s were kind of a tough time but my 40s have been the best overall
Just hit 50 and lemme tell ya – it gets better every year!
Confidence and finally hitting my stride in my career
Had money
When you turn 30 your fairy godmother appears and hits you with her “I don’t give a fuck” magic wand. This is real. Sometimes she arrives early and sometimes your abusive parents or ex trapped her and put her in a cage so it takes her a little bit longer to get to you, but she always finds you in the end.
And then… You just don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks. And it’s amazing. You start doing whatever you want and wearing whatever you want and learn that petty shit doesn’t matter.
I’m less poor & less stupid.
As someone who is 37, my 20s weren’t that bad. My health was much better and I feel like I was able to take care of myself better. I started my 30s being a parent so maybe that’s why I fondly look back at my 20s. If I didn’t have kids maybe being in my 30s would’ve been less stressful or maybe worse? I love my kids but my body is hurting 😭.
27 comments
More money and financial stability, being in an actual field of work, having finished all schooling finally, and having more friends.
My MH is significantly better than it was when I was in my late teens and twenties. While I’ve gained weight, I have more time to go to the gym or for a walk than I did while in college or grad school. Outside work, I can prioritize whatever I want. I like when I leave work (for the most part), I can go home and not do work unlike times when I had homework. I like having PTO to take off days of work and do nothing. I’ve developed more friendships since I was younger. My career is person focused, so I feel like my social skills and ability to feel confident socializing has improved.
My 20’s were horrible! I was diagnosed with epilepsy at 21 and it wasn’t controlled well throughout my 20s. I went to college late and struggle with college thanks to having epilepsy but I finally graduated couple years ago. I couldn’t drive throughout my 20’s which means zero independence and freedom. My relationships were horrible and I now have horrible self-esteem. In my 30’s its like I restarted my life that I never had in my 20s
Confidence from not giving as many fricks.
For me it was because I got a little glow up, gained a ton of confidence, and finally landed my career in lending that I worked my entire 20s to achieve.
For me I cared a lot more about what others thought when I was in my 20’s. I also had a lot of fomo so self care often took a backseat. Having more money and no student loans is also helpful.
That said, I don’t regret how I spent my 20’s. It made me into who I am and I really cherish the memories. You can’t enjoy your 30’s without figuring shit out in your 20’s first.
Cos I knew who I was by the time I hit my 30s
I’m now so much braver, smarter, wiser, and better suited to stand up for myself, acting as my own cheerleader and protector than I was in my 20s.
I don’t feel as unsure.
Escaped abusive parent.
My early 20s were much better
Definitely more money.
More money, better rep in the industry to have a good career, and met enough people to be more confident in myself and not care about what others think. Also better ability to see through people and their intentions.
I am just generally more confident, have a better idea of my interests and boundaries, feel better about my mind and body, know better now to take care of myself mentally and physically, and I finally quit drinking.
My 20s were soooo chaotic. I moved out at 17 to a city far away from my hometown and immediately started acting like a wild animal let out of a cage. Partied and drank a lot, went to raves and did drugs (nothing hardcore thank god, but I’m no stranger to ecstasy and lsd). Had a string of horrible and unhealthy relationships, my mental health was in the toilet, and the cherry on top of the shit cake was when I got diagnosed with cancer at 27! It was a nightmare.
I spent my 20s partying, having a slew of relationships, and genuinely thinking I was living an “exciting” life when really I was suppressing my emotions and trying to run away from my mental health issues.
I honestly think the cancer was what saved me. I realized I needed to get my shit together, because life is so fragile. In my 20s I thought I was invincible, now I’m wise enough to know I’m not special. I broke up with my abusive boyfriend, moved back home with my parents, and started meds and therapy. I practiced living a sober, stable life until it stuck. Sometimes I miss the “Wild days” and look back fondly at those nights where I had so much fun, but I know now that fun comes with a price. So I spend my days working, volunteering, taking care of my health and doing hobbies. I don’t need chaos or wildness or excitement, I need peace. And I’m finding a lot of solace in that in my 30s. So I think it’s definitely going better than my 20s!!
I feel like 20s were the grind. School/work/social life/establishing independence. 30s are a lot of relaxed and enjoying my long-term relationships and life. It’s less anxious and hectic for me.
I’ve just started my 30s and I’d say it’s mainly the feeling of being more settled somewhere. Settled in my career, married to my life partner, a solid group of friends who are staying put for the foreseeable future, home ownership, being part of my local community. I spent my 20s being very transient, jumping between jobs and different cities, making friends who’d disappear after a year because either they moved or I did.
I once saw, “Your 30s are like your 20s, but with money.” And I think that’s true for the most part. But aside from generally being in a better place financially and professionally, you just have more maturity and life experience, so you don’t waste your time and energy on things you shouldn’t and generally make better decisions. So you spend less time dealing with the fallout of bad decisions.
I don’t make the same stupid mistakes that I did in my twenties, but I’m still young. That would be my answer.
Main reason – you stop seeking validation from others and comparing yourself to everyone else.
For me it’s been my kids. Having a kid is Sooooo much work. But it’s absolutely worth it. It breathes new purpose into your life. AND you get to re-experience things through their eyes.
For me, they’re pretty much the same. Nothing has really changed. But i’m also only 34, so I have half a decade of my 30s left.
My 30s were kind of a tough time but my 40s have been the best overall
Just hit 50 and lemme tell ya – it gets better every year!
Confidence and finally hitting my stride in my career
Had money
When you turn 30 your fairy godmother appears and hits you with her “I don’t give a fuck” magic wand. This is real. Sometimes she arrives early and sometimes your abusive parents or ex trapped her and put her in a cage so it takes her a little bit longer to get to you, but she always finds you in the end.
And then… You just don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks. And it’s amazing. You start doing whatever you want and wearing whatever you want and learn that petty shit doesn’t matter.
I’m less poor & less stupid.
As someone who is 37, my 20s weren’t that bad. My health was much better and I feel like I was able to take care of myself better. I started my 30s being a parent so maybe that’s why I fondly look back at my 20s. If I didn’t have kids maybe being in my 30s would’ve been less stressful or maybe worse? I love my kids but my body is hurting 😭.