I was lucky to make a lot of friends growing up, and have had a close knit day one friend group for basically my entire life. We have always found a way to stay connected despite the obstacles life throws at us. Some have moved out town but we all still live in the same state.
At some point in our late 20’s, I started to notice a shift in how I was being treated by them. I was normally the one to initiate plans and was always open-minded about hanging out doing things together in general.
Eventually, specifically after COVID, it started to feel like I was burdening them with an inconvenience by asking to hang out in real life, since now Discord had become the default way to “hang out”. I started to feel like a background character. So I stopped trying.
They all play an online multiplayer video game together that they know I have no interest in and don’t enjoy. A long time ago I tried playing with them a few times, and I was essentially bullied by them for not being good enough, even though I was brand new. I decided that wasn’t fun. Fast forward 6 years and it’s still basically all they do, while making little to no effort to find a game, or god forbid something in real life that we can all mutually enjoy. And then they have the audacity to ask me why I haven’t joined their Discord channel lately. Maybe because I don’t enjoy spending all of my free time on a fucking computer, sitting on the sidelines watching you stream a game you know I couldn’t care less about?
I lost my job earlier this year and they know my mental health has been shaky. Does anyone reach out and ask how I’m doing? Maybe offer some advice on businesses they know are hiring? Maybe a referral? Of course not. I’ve tried organizing multiple little trips for us and I get treated like I’m a lepper by them. One in particular friend agreed to go on a trip to a neighboring state to meet another one of our friends, and flaked out at the last minute. So I’m done. I’ll still be here if they need me, but I decided don’t need them anymore.
How do you move on from people without harboring resentment and bitterness though? :\