I ‘50 F’ have been married for over 20 years to ‘50 M’. Basically over the length of our marriage he has told me to stfu, sworn at me and called me horrible names. I have become numb to it and now that our youngest is almost graduating high school I want out of the marriage. I asked my husband if he is sorry for the names he has called me and he said no. That all the names were warranted due to my behavior. Im looking to heal our marriage but I cant do it alone. He tells me if Im a ‘good wife’ then our marriage will be better. Im on an island alone here. He wants intimacy but I hold so much contempt towards him. He is a good provider and father but in this area he isnt. He wont admit to being inappropriate and wont get couples counseling. I think I just need to hear if Im insane and the problem??