I don't know whats allowed on this reddit community but I really need support right now. I am 21 years old and I fell in love with a women who is 3 years older than me, and we broke up 2 years ago. Long story short we broke up because she kept hiding her phone, snapchatting these "random" guys, and I felt uncomfortable about that, but she hid her phone from me.
She says she loved me but was laughing at guy's jokes at the pub, texting random guys and it killed me. 2 years later after the break up because of me wanting security over our relationship I still see her, we still talk trying to make things work, and yet she still plays with my feelings. We have sex ever so often but her Mother and Father hates me because I got angry at the fact I felt insecure about her intertaining these males and somehow its my fault for: "Not feeling secure about her not cheating". After our breakup we made a deal to let each other know if we have intercourse with other males/females and yet she didn't tell me about this guy that was in the "Army" (Which I think is a huge lie considering we stay in a small village). I need help getting over her, making me feel wanted then pushing me out in a loop.