— Long Post, bear with me —
Hi All,
I’m a 31-year-old unmarried male working in a Tier-1 city away from home.
Things at home have become emotionally exhausting. My father has mostly been emotionally absent for years and only seems to care about money. My mother, on the other hand, has become increasingly frustrated with life and often talks about leaving everything and living alone.
My brother and I try our best to support her. She recently picked up hobbies like gardening and keeping fishes, and we also have a dog who comforts her. I’ve asked her to come stay with me for a change, but she refuses because of them.
What worries me most is her health. She’s 55, barely walks, overthinks constantly, and doesn’t really focus on herself.
Today she told me the family problems are because I’m not married yet and that things would improve if I got married. Honestly, that hurt. One reason I delayed marriage was because I didn’t want another person entering an already stressful environment.
My father has also started making comments like “go ask your son for money” during household discussions, which I think has affected my mother emotionally too.
Now she wants to buy some gold jewellery she had been planning for a while and asked me to pay for it. I don’t mind spending on her, but I’m confused whether this is the right decision financially or emotionally driven because of everything happening around her.
At this point I just feel stuck between responsibilities, guilt, and trying to emotionally support everyone from a distance.
Would appreciate perspectives from people who’ve dealt with similar family situations.