My husband has expressed interest in going out with coworkers for drinks after work, the thing is that he works until past midnight so he would like me to be okay with him going out till 1:30 – 2 in the morning.
Last night he asked me if it was okay for him to go out after work and I told him that it’s fine, but he knows I don’t like it. His coworkers, who I am sure are very nice, but are not exactly the kind of people that we hang out with. They drink and smoke a lot, they sometimes drink while they are working. My husband tells me these stories because he thinks it’s funny, which they work in a kitchen so that isn’t very surprising. I have no issue with people who go out to bars or smoke, but we aren’t like this. We don’t party or drink anymore. We both had our time doing that when we were younger but that is not our value as we are older now. His coworkers are single and they party and smoke in their free time. I told my husband that I don’t want to control him, and I trust him 100%, but I also let him know that when you spend time with someone, you tend to become like them. He used to drink a lot when he was younger and he had a bit of a drinking problem before when we were in school. Now, he hardly drinks, and he will only have one or two drinks at most.
Is it controlling to tell him that I don’t like the idea of him going out very late after work to the bar with his coworkers? I told him that I trust his decision, but he knows how I feel about it.