Just hear me out. We’ve been married for almost three years now. I love him immensely & that’s not conditional on his appearance, but we’re at a little bit of an impasse. He’s frustrated that we’re only having sex about once a month… while also not putting any effort into his appearance. I wouldn’t be encouraging some dramatic change, or even anything he hasn’t done before. Just maybe work out a couple times a week & some basic skincare. He used to be in great shape, which he talks about a lot & had a skincare routine.
I think we took two different approaches to life after marriage. He’s my husband & I want to look good for him! I personally feel like it’s a small sign of respect but also helps keep the physical intimacy alive, seeing as we want to keep a good thing going for the rest of our lives. And before anyone comes with pitchforks, he’s made small comments about my appearance occasionally, once that my ass had gotten smaller (I’m breastfeeding, it definitely did, I started working out as a result because my ass was my prized possession once upon a time) and that he was glad I finally got some new panties (Also not wrong, I was wearing my pregnancy granny panties for a while there.)
I don’t know. Am I supposed to feign ignorance about what’s killing our sex life? Is that really the kinder thing?