22F single mom with a 9 month old son. I recently started working Monday-Friday full time, and I have a babysitter watching my son during work hours (8-5). She’s in her late 30s and is actually related to an old close family friend, so there was already some trust there before she started babysitting.
She’s honestly great with my son. She sends multiple updates throughout the day, pictures, videos, lets me know how he’s eating/sleeping, etc. I’ve never had concerns about his safety or care.
But lately I’ve been feeling overwhelmed by how much communication continues outside of work hours too. Saturday morning she texts me how her son and husband wake up asking where my son is. She replies to almost every Facebook story I post, messages me often on weekends saying she misses him, asks for updates, and even tries to FaceTime sometimes when she’s off. For example, this weekend she’s at a pool resort and still trying to FaceTime me and check in.
I feel guilty even typing this because she genuinely cares about my son, and I know many parents would love that. But after working all week, weekends are basically the only uninterrupted time I get to just enjoy being with my baby without constantly thinking about schedules, childcare, work, or someone else helping raise him during the week.
Part of me feels suffocated and like I can’t mentally “clock out” from the babysitter dynamic. I’ve started ignoring some messages because I just want private family time and space. At the same time, I don’t want to hurt her feelings or come across as ungrateful.
Am I being unreasonable for wanting more distance/boundaries outside work hours? How would you handle this without making things awkward?