I (23F) was exclusive but getting to know this guy (24M) for the past two months. Things were progressing well. He was busier at work lately but he still made time for me and we still went on dates. We did not have sex because I told him my boundary was a relationship. He was fine with that. He did try but I told him I wanted a relationship before that.
Last date we had I was at his place after and we cuddled, watched a movie, I met one of his roommates, we got more physically intimate, and I opened up that I liked him and he said he liked me too. He wanted me to stay the night but I said I couldn’t. He tried convincing me to stay but I ended up not wanting to. I asked him why he hadn’t asked me to be his gf yet. I did mention seriously to him that I have a deadline for it.
He said to me that he needs to see me more often and that we can talk more about this on our next date. I agreed and left. Then the weeks after his behavior was a little more distant but I dismissed it as work being the reason since he was staying at work till like 12 am
Then his dating app location, which he claimed he deleted, changed.
Then a hour before our date he messages me cancelling and calls me ending it. The conversation started out with how he had been doing some thinking and he can’t see this long term.
Like why drag this on for two months and end it an hr before you were supposed to see me? Apparently he said he just realized this.
I don’t know guys. I feel like this is a common pattern. Guys chase me or pursue me and then around the two month mark realize they don’t want something serious with me.
Like what even is this?
Like the crazy part is that I know I’m a catch. I’m doing well for myself, I can bake (baked for him), I emotionally supported him, I was loyal, and I was a clear communicator. On our first date he even asked me how I was still single… this is exactly why I’m still single lmao
Also, for those wondering, I removed him off of all social media immediately after and even unmatched him from the dating app. He was apologizing over call too but I told him not to apologize the second time and he wished me the best and I said bye and ended the call 💀
TLDR: Was exclusive with a guy for 2 months, went on ~10 dates, got emotionally closer over time, and he consistently pursued me. I told him I wanted a relationship before sex and he said he respected that. On our last date we cuddled at his place, got more intimate, and both admitted we liked each other. I asked why he hadn’t asked me to be his gf yet and he said we’d talk about it more next date.
Then he became a bit distant, his dating app location updated despite saying he deleted the apps, and an hour before our next date he cancelled and called saying he “thought about it” and doesn’t see this long term. Feeling confused because this seems to happen a lot where guys pursue me hard then pull away around the 2 month mark.