My post history contains more details, but I (35M) will summarise the situation before asking for help.
– We have been together for six years and own a house together. We also have a dog.
– For the past two years, uncertainty around whether we were aligned on having children has been a recurring issue in our relationship.
– During this time, my partner became increasingly resentful and unhappy, but she never fully communicated the depth of those feelings to me.
– Over time, our relationship began to deteriorate.
– Meanwhile, I was gradually shifting my own mindset toward wanting children.
– She has now told me that she no longer sees a future together and doesn’t believe we are each other’s forever partners.
– We are still living together for now, but we are in the process of separating.
– I went away for the weekend to give her space and one final opportunity to think through this major life decision. She said she would spend the weekend reflecting on things.
– While I’ve been away, I’ve noticed some unusual patterns in her behaviour lately.
– I’ve done some social media digging, and I suspect she may have been spending time with a male from a new friendship group who lives nearby.
– She has become unresponsive over the weekend and hasn’t been checking her phone.
– I think there’s a real possibility she may be using this weekend to spend time with, date, or even sleep with this new guy.
– I can’t control my thoughts at the moment, and I’m devastated.
– I don’t know whether I should confront this when I get home or not.
– if I did, it would be in a polite non accusation al way
I’m in desperate need of some help, can anyone shed some help on how I should manage this?
TL;DR:
My long-term partner and I are separating after years of uncertainty around children and growing resentment in the relationship. While I’ve been away giving her space to think, I’ve become convinced there may be another guy involved. I’m spiralling mentally, devastated, and unsure whether to confront my suspicions or focus only on the relationship itself when I return home.