I grew up pretty poor, so over the years I’ve gotten pretty good at saving up money. I’m in college right now so I can’t work quite full time, but I would say that I definitely work a lot more than other people in my position and that has allowed me to save around 6 months rent in case of emergencies. To preface this, I buy pretty little for myself and when I do need something I go to thrift stores or Facebook marketplace. I eat out very rarely and cook most of my meals at home, and im the type to turn the heating or ac off when im not at home to save on energy. My boyfriend on the other hand grew up in a decently wealthy household and definitely never had to worry about having a roof over his head or food on the table. His parents give him an allowance every month for the “essentials” and any money he makes from working goes straight to his hobbies. There’s very frequently less than $50 in both his checking and savings. We both split rent even which is nice (although I will admit im pretty sure that’s his parents money) but there are times when his spending habits really start to irk me. For example, we recently moved in together about 2 months ago after dating for 2 years. His parents gave us a bunch of “housewarming” money (like—several thousand dollars) so we could get some household essentials (like furniture and dishes). Well, we didn’t use all of it initially because we’ve been settling in and waiting to see what we really *NEED* (like dang, turns out we probably do need a wet vacuum) opposed to just want. Without telling me, he spent the rest of the money on his hobbies. Now today he approached me telling me he only has $30ish in his checking account. I guess im just feeling disappointed and unsure, things like this feel really immature to me and instead of getting better he’s been getting worse. I can’t wrap my head around being so financially irresponsible and im not sure how to approach this issue at all. Has anyone else been in a similar situation, and how do you try fixing it? I’ve thought about a joint account, or some sort of budgeting plan. On one hand though I don’t want to be his “mom”, but on the other maybe he needs someone in his life to put their foot down?
TLDR; my boyfriend of 2 years is very financially irresponsible and it’s stressing me out a lot