For some context, I (25F) am more of a “saver” type of person. I will splurge on things seldomly, and am still able to pay bills. BF (28M) is a spender, he pays his bills on time including his own and our split rent and utilities, and never asks me for money.
BF (28M) does not want to talk about money. He is around 17K in credit card debt, from previous hobbies and bills charged to it. That credit card is shut down, and now he uses only his debit card. When I try and suggest that we save money for a future house or to put more money towards the debt, he gets upset at me and shuts down. He just sold his collection, which has given him extra cash, but is still spending money and getting packages daily. I plan on keeping our finances separate if we get married, which he agrees to.
I want to see him pay off his debt so he doesn’t have to worry, but he shuts me down everytime, and continues to spend it on various items. Am I being unreasonable to ask him to save?
I love him, and I don’t want to come across as if I am trying to control him, but he blows me off everytime. His family has even approached him regarding this, and he gets annoyed with them as well. I just don’t want to see him struggle with all the debt he has.
TLDR: BF (28M) has bad spending habits, refuses to talk about debt or saving strategies with me (25F).