I feel like trash how I behaved. We were argueing a lot, and we decided to break up after 18 months (15 too many). Boy, was I the asshole…
She was direct with what she wants, and I kept ignoring her. I really was passive aggressive. I did things I won't confess to, but it'd be 200% justified to call me creepy toxic piece of shit.
My intentions maybe were good and I thought I care how she feels, but the outcome… Jesus fucking Christ. I hope she is doing better now, and found something that makes her happy.
We both made a mistake of staying with person who cared very little about the other one or ourself, and we had no clue how to resolve conflicts. We both ignored our red flags, and had no self respect. I recall discussion when we both said we date because we are afraid nobody else would want us X.X We were about 20 yo. After break up I required mental health from a doctor, cause the relationship broke me too. In fact she also kept reminding me how useless I am.
I don't know if I should even apologize her. It was like 3 or 4 years ago, and I think I shouldn't remind her about myself. Maybe I should just let her forget and live her life.
If you somehow read this L. and you recall my username – I am terribly sorry. I know it won't change anything for you, but at least I realized wtf I have done, and I won't repeat those mistakes. I truly regret my behavior