First of all I want to apologise for my bad English.
There is this girl I met in summer that she came with her friend in my city for vacation. I was working in a souvenir shop and I saw her pass by the store a couple of times. Eventually they entered the shop to browse some T-shirts and magnets. I obviously approached them politely to ask them if they need any help. They asked me if I had a specific T-shirt to another size and I realized that they are from a certain Balkan country that I happened to know the language because I’m mixed. Anyway…. I started to speak that language and they were really excited.
I didn’t ask for instagram or whatever at the spot but the next few days they were always passing by the store multiple times a day. I took that chance and made them a bet. I said “ if you pass by 10 times in total today I get to have your insta, deal?” And I got myself a deal. They actually did it🥹😊 Hahaha anyway. We planned to go to the beach together the following day and we had a really good time.I learned her how to swimm🤣. We went out for a drink one more time after that day and then we hugged, we said goodbye and they returned to their country in the morning (NOTHING ROMANTIC HAPPENED)
We continued chatting on insta for 2-3 months. We had some cute convos and heart emojis and bullshit but neither me nor her made a 100% confession like” I really like you” or something. The hint was 100% there but I didn’t feel like telling that via instagram. The chat was slowly dying and I got bored and just totally disappeared. (I know I know it was very immature from me and I I’m not proud that I did that but that’s what happened) We had a pause because of my ghosting for about 2-3 months.
FINALY, after all those months I posted a story of myself and she reacted with 😍. She said “you forgot meee🥹” I felt really bad. We had an amazing chat that day and I was really happy we began to talk again…. Same story… heart emojis cute words etc…. Buuuut the chat is beginning to really die once more….
I don’t know…. I really like this girl. She is so sweet and kind and smart. But sometimes I feel like an ashole. We live in 2 different worlds me and her. Imagine her like a little sweet bunny and imagine me like a beaten up hyena. What can I possibly offer her? My life is kinda shit right now and I’m dealing with a lot of stuff at the same time( parent’s health, dept,addictions,friendships slowly going to shit, and may more)
I feel like I had my chances to tell her and that the chemistry is not the same. Maybe there was no chemistry ever at all… idk… I’ve never had a relationship. I only went from one girl to another without any feelings whatsoever. But she is something different. Sorry if I’m not making my self clear but it’s just too much to process hahaha I’m still processing things as I writhe this…Anyway
Thanks for reading, stranger❤️