What are the differences in how you go about picking up male friends vs how you go about picking up female lovers?
April 4, 2026
What are the differences in how you go about picking up male friends vs how you go about picking up female lovers?
18 comments
I don’t approach men friendships with romantic intentions like I do with women lovers.
It all really depends on their weights and specific leverages. Some are easier to lift than others but it’s all possible if you have a solid plan and a good foundation.
Mostly the same but one of them usually includes a moment when I let them know I want to suck on their titties.
I have sex with men so the men I refuse to have sex with cause they are ugly af, those are my friends.
“Female lovers” is a very Reddit way to put it
This is the second time in 3 days i’ve seen someone throw out the idea of men approaching other men to be friends. I’m 42 years old and have never had a stranger walk up to me and chat me up to be a friend. The two times that has happened the guys wanted to hook up. Its not something men do. Men tend to develop friendships with people within thier communities and they develop organically
My older brother is the type who can go into Starbucks and leave with a drink and 4 new friends he made waiting on line and it always struck me as a kind of witch craft. This is like something the very top of the top of personable/extroverted me do. I know like 3 people who are like this and that’s it
In terms of getting to know them absolutely no difference. I would ask them very similar questions e.g. hobbies, work, interests, childhood, upbringing, etc.
Obviously with a romantic interest I would incorporate flirting in there to test the waters and see if we have sexual chemistry little by little, but besides that mostly the same.
When I pickup my male friends I greet them at the door with a kiss on the cheek. For female lovers I honk the horn and shout “hurry up”.
The lovers don’t have a penis.
I really want to hear the bi guys chime in.
There identical for me, i dont “go around picking up friends”. Not going to be in any ones friend zone, ever…
I kiss my homies so idk
Picking male friends… Holy crap look at that guy, he’s swallowing a sword, this is a guy I need to know, “Hey buddy want a beer? How do you not put that through your stomach?”
Picking female lovers, To self, “She’s hot, wonder if she’s easy.”
To her: “Hi, How you doing?”
”Females”
It is usually the same for both men amd women. If you’re early, you’re going to be pissed because they will be late. If you’re on time then they’re usually happy but expect it to still be a wait. If I’m late they both have attitudes. Personally I could give a rat’s ass about my homie being on bitch mode, but my wife. After I acknowledge the tardy arrival through apology or justifiable explanation of acts of god or other reasons completely out of my control, she will show her frustrations through short answers and silence. She will acknowledge I was late and it created anxiety, a sense of abandonment, deprioritization and foreboding. She will then go forward as if she is some oracle or witch to tell some depraved future based on me being late where everyone laughs at her. She then settles into deep anger as I appear to have checked out of the conversation. I will make faces expressing my dissatisfaction with her self-premanifested meanderings. She will ask why am I making faces breathing in frustration or completely ignoring her agitation. I will respond I love you very matter of fact. She becomes more annoyed and suddenly she has a headache. I’m considering ending the whole fiasco of wherever we’re going because I don’t want to deal with her attitude in public. Both of us are on high anxiety and frustrations. Then some bastard cuts me off. We both hate that shit. Now we’re communicating about the bastard. We start holding hands. She tells me about something one of her dumb ass Facebook friends said, I tell her something I saw on Reddit. I don’t know why the fuck I typed this.
These are two entirely separate activities, and as such, no meaningful comparisons can be made.
I avoid both like the plauge
Most of my male friendships develop naturally and start with just seeing people in the same place as me.
When going for a date I have to put in effort to make that known
18 comments
I don’t approach men friendships with romantic intentions like I do with women lovers.
It all really depends on their weights and specific leverages. Some are easier to lift than others but it’s all possible if you have a solid plan and a good foundation.
Mostly the same but one of them usually includes a moment when I let them know I want to suck on their titties.
I have sex with men so the men I refuse to have sex with cause they are ugly af, those are my friends.
“Female lovers” is a very Reddit way to put it
This is the second time in 3 days i’ve seen someone throw out the idea of men approaching other men to be friends. I’m 42 years old and have never had a stranger walk up to me and chat me up to be a friend. The two times that has happened the guys wanted to hook up. Its not something men do. Men tend to develop friendships with people within thier communities and they develop organically
My older brother is the type who can go into Starbucks and leave with a drink and 4 new friends he made waiting on line and it always struck me as a kind of witch craft. This is like something the very top of the top of personable/extroverted me do. I know like 3 people who are like this and that’s it
In terms of getting to know them absolutely no difference. I would ask them very similar questions e.g. hobbies, work, interests, childhood, upbringing, etc.
Obviously with a romantic interest I would incorporate flirting in there to test the waters and see if we have sexual chemistry little by little, but besides that mostly the same.
When I pickup my male friends I greet them at the door with a kiss on the cheek. For female lovers I honk the horn and shout “hurry up”.
The lovers don’t have a penis.
I really want to hear the bi guys chime in.
There identical for me, i dont “go around picking up friends”. Not going to be in any ones friend zone, ever…
I kiss my homies so idk
Picking male friends… Holy crap look at that guy, he’s swallowing a sword, this is a guy I need to know, “Hey buddy want a beer? How do you not put that through your stomach?”
Picking female lovers, To self, “She’s hot, wonder if she’s easy.”
To her: “Hi, How you doing?”
”Females”
It is usually the same for both men amd women. If you’re early, you’re going to be pissed because they will be late. If you’re on time then they’re usually happy but expect it to still be a wait. If I’m late they both have attitudes. Personally I could give a rat’s ass about my homie being on bitch mode, but my wife. After I acknowledge the tardy arrival through apology or justifiable explanation of acts of god or other reasons completely out of my control, she will show her frustrations through short answers and silence. She will acknowledge I was late and it created anxiety, a sense of abandonment, deprioritization and foreboding. She will then go forward as if she is some oracle or witch to tell some depraved future based on me being late where everyone laughs at her. She then settles into deep anger as I appear to have checked out of the conversation. I will make faces expressing my dissatisfaction with her self-premanifested meanderings. She will ask why am I making faces breathing in frustration or completely ignoring her agitation. I will respond I love you very matter of fact. She becomes more annoyed and suddenly she has a headache. I’m considering ending the whole fiasco of wherever we’re going because I don’t want to deal with her attitude in public. Both of us are on high anxiety and frustrations. Then some bastard cuts me off. We both hate that shit. Now we’re communicating about the bastard. We start holding hands. She tells me about something one of her dumb ass Facebook friends said, I tell her something I saw on Reddit. I don’t know why the fuck I typed this.
These are two entirely separate activities, and as such, no meaningful comparisons can be made.
I avoid both like the plauge
Most of my male friendships develop naturally and start with just seeing people in the same place as me.
When going for a date I have to put in effort to make that known