I just got back home from a date. I've been talking to this man for a little over a week. We actually met on Reddit. We really seemed to click over text and in person. I met him at a rooftop bar tonight, everything was going well and we went to a second bar too. Then after about 30 minutes of being there, I went to the bathroom and he left. Then the woman next to us, asked me if we were together and she told me he ran out of there the second I went to the bathroom. I don't understand what happened. I texted him to see if everything is okay and he has not responded. This has never happened to me before. I'm confused, I'm angry too. Anyone have some advice? Is this normal? I genuinely don't understand why someone would do that. He gave no warning that he was not interested. He was his idea to go to a second bar… I don't get it at all
43 comments
its not normal and they did it because they don’t respect you. Just move on take this as a blessing
Block immediately, he should not be able to have access to you anymore. Good riddance to whomever he is.
That’s messed up and know he’s the one who’s in the wrong!
He’s married & saw someone he knew 😳
Maybe he saw his wife at the restaurant.
It’s not normal and it’s extremely rude. Just move on. You can do better.
Going to the second bar is an unnecessarily elaborate way to ditch you.
I’m so sorry you had this happen to you. You may never know the reason, but know this — IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU…. And EVERYTHING to do with him. Whatever his reason he wasn’t grown up enough, respectful enough or kind enough to be honest with you. All that means is he isn’t worthy of you or worth another second of time. This truly is a “you dodged a bullet” moment.
I’m so angry about this and it didn’t even happen to me
Dodged a bullet girly! Probably has a gf or a wife. Who knows. Block and move on. Nothing wrong with you or anything you did. Blessing in disguise!
Just curious, what did the two of you order at the first bar, and who paid?
It may be possible that he was irritated if he paid the whole bill, so he may have set up the second bar to drink and dash on you, so that you would be stuck with this bill.
The weirdest part about this is that you went to a second bar. The night was probably almost over so he couldve just ended the night normally and not called again. How strange. Maybe he shit himself or something.
Not really sure what advice you need. If he left and then ignored your text there seems to be only one option, move on
How rude, don’t get all in your head about it, it’s a him problem not a you problem
What did you order for drinks and Did he leave you with the check?
It doesn’t really matter if he’s a cheater, or just a coward. Either way, you don’t need that bullshit. He did you a favor
Where’d you meet?
If a guy youre dating has no mutual friends no one finds out hes a jerk, so thats his true self, consider yourself spared. That or the lady is like the goldfinger lady and the guy was kidnapped.
Not normal & he’s a coward.
Holy shit, how obnoxious. I’ve been ghosted at the meet-up, but this is maybe worse. I’m so sorry this happened to you, u/AcceptableScore7232. This is NOT NORMAL, and I know it stings and sucks, but it isn’t about you. It reflects on him. I know it’s hard not to take it personally, but it’s really not personal. As someone wise once told me, “The bird doesn’t shit on my car. The bird just shits.”
I read a Reddit post recently about a guy who shit his pants in the middle of a dinner date, didnt get up, and sat it in for the rest of the date. So honestly, who the fuck knows people are weirdos
I’m sorry this happened! Honestly don’t take it personally, he may have assumed you were doing the same thing. Especially if you took your purse with you, either way it’s a him thing!
Dine and dash?
Dude probably saw a flag and dipped.
You probably will never find out why.
I’d try to just laugh it off because wow how pathetic
That’s messed up.. I am glad this has never happened to me. But something is wrong with people….
Maybe he is not single, noticed his significant other or one of their mutual friends at the second bar, and ran out not to be seen.
He’s a coward. This demonstrates so much about himself
Did he poop himself?
Stop waiting for his text back. He’s not going to give you closure because closure would require him to admit he did something cowardly. People who run out of bars don’t follow up with honest explanations. They disappear and hope you just get the message.
You cant really break up with someone though if you are only on the second date they arent really together yet but it is weird.
ok so i had this happen to me once except i was the one who almost left. not because the date was bad but because my anxiety convinced me she was texting her friends about how boring i was while i was in the bathroom. turns out she was literally ordering us dessert. anyway point is his leaving says everything about him and nothing about you. a week of texting means nothing, some people just cant handle real life interaction and bail when it gets real. rooftop bar date sounds fire tho so at least the vibes were immaculate
You should consider yourself lucky. He’s an asshole, treating you like that. He would probably have hurt you if he stayed around for longer. The hell with the bastard.
Maybe he was a serial killer but liked you too much. He didnt want you to be his next victim so he just left!
He either shat himself or you said something just before you went to the bathroom that rang his alarm bell?
sorry that happened to you. only he knows why he ran out on your date, but don’t dwell on it – it’s not worth your time.
Either he is a dick, or he is a dick and you have huge red flags
Did you drive separately to the second bar? My guess is that he decided he wanted to ditch you on the way but chickened out. He had another opportunity when you went to the restroom and took it. Some men make a habit of ditching women that way because they are cowards.
Forget about an apology or explanation. He might, however, message you in a few weeks or months and pretend like nothing happened. If you bring it up he will apologize. Make no mistake, a man who abandons you once will abandon you again. Forget about him.
One time a guy came over to hook up and I gave him a bj & he said he needed a honey pack from his car and I was like oh ok lol and then he just left <3 blocked on everything. For a while I was hell bent on finding and confronting him, maybe smacking him. Actually now that I talk abt it I might! But it’s not normal, you deserve better and will find better
A date once did the opposite which is worse. She went to the bathroom and never came back. It was impossible for me to check to see if she was still there because the bathrooms were gendered, so I waited like 30 minutes or an hour eventually people around me were laughing. It was a busy bar. And I think because I started crying saying what happened to me when I was a kid. She abandoned me for that and people around started laughing.
I wonder if he spotted his wife or girlfriend or another person she knows who would tell on him at the first bar.
Then he got you out of there and ditched ASAP so he could run back and make an excuse that you were a work colleague or such.
That’s all I can think of.
I think him leaving as soon as you went to the bathroom is an indication that he wasn’t interested. Onto the next. And protip don’t text people who run away from you