I’m (29F) coming on here for some help and advice. I have been with my boyfriend (30M) for 2 years and we moved in together 6 months ago. Prior to moving in we were long distance and would only see other on weekends, and during that time we had lots of sex and affection. Since we moved in, this has dropped drastically to sex maybe twice a week and affection on hs side has so dropped. He works in construction and does long days so he is very tired come the end of the day, and he also wakes up at 4:30am daily. I however struggle with a lot of relationship anxiety and am anxiously attached, and this is a massive worry for me. My love language is physical touch and due to a huge amount of childhood trauma and rejection from my parents, if I don’t get this from him then I feel unwanted, rejected and unloved. His love language is acts of service, he does so much for me and when I think about this I feel awful because I’ve been moaning at him when he otherwise does so much for me. Other than this, the relationship is perfect. He is my best friend, we laugh together, have the most amazing time and it’s otherwise the best relationship I have ever been in. I am struggling at the moment massively with the lack of physical touch and I have raised this to him but he is more avoidant when it comes to this and its causing friction as he says h when he’s stressed and tired then sex and physical affection is the last thing he wants and it’s hard for him to give it to me whilst he’s in his head. I’m looking for support or suggestions on how we (mostly I) can overcome this because I’m not showing up as the best partner during these times I’m feeling rejected, I’m extremely emotional and it’s putting a strain on our relationship. I don’t want this to be a relationship-ending situation because everything is otherwise perfect so any help would be greatly appreciated
TLDR: Mismatched love languages with physical touch and acts of service and feeling undesired