My husband and I have been married for the last 4 years and have been together for 6 years in total. This has been an ongoing problem in our relationship for a while. He says we don’t have sex enough. I come from a family who shamed sex. I told my mom I did it for the first time and I went to therapy for the next 6 months. I was very hyper sexual as a teenager because I thought that was the only way I would receive attention and love. Then I met my husband and I continued to have sex even when I didn’t want to. This obviously put a rift in between us until we sat and talked about it. I told him that him asking me makes me feel like I have to. I told him it wasn’t his fault but I wanted to be honest with him. I worked on myself and now I know I can say no. So that’s not a problem anymore. Just backstory. Anyway fast forward we still have sex but it’s not enough to him. Ever since I realized that I don’t need to be hyper sexual anymore and I can say no, I say it all the time now. I’m not a sexual person and my libido isn’t high at all. He sees me and he just wants to go for it. I see him and I see someone that I’m attracted to but I don’t see him and think “I wanna jump his bones right now” It’s hard because it has been a problem for a while. We’ll be good and we’ll have sex a lot and then it’ll dwindle down because I just don’t want to. I understand he sees it as rejection but it’s not that. I just don’t want to and I don’t wanna say yes when I’m not in the mood because now we’re back to making me uncomfortable to keep him comfortable. I guess I’m not sure why I’m posting this. I don’t know if I want advice or if I just wanted to vent. Because what advice is there to give? You either have sex with him or you don’t. You either leave him so he can’t find someone who is on the same sexual level as him or you don’t.
TLDR: My husband says we don’t have enough sex