idk if it’s all just in my head but I feel like my friends look down on me or see me as like a jester… they never post me on their socials like they post their other friends. This applies to people im close with as well. I get invited to stuff often and I know they enjoy my presence I think? But I’m always the one taking pictures at functions and hang outs, they only take a couple pics of me if i ask or it’ll be a second thought. And the pics would always suck. Whereas it’s kind of a given they take high effort pics of each other. I don’t usually care for this kind of thing but I couldn’t help but spiral about other stuff too cus a friend didn’t invite me to a nice bday dinner she had and I only got invited to her party That was basically held with her family. It’s just little stuff like that. Kinda started to bother me. I just feel like nobody shows me love in public. I’ve literally had people say that I’m “underrated” and want to gatekeep me which i dont really understand. it’s not like I’m ugly not to be conceited but I’m objectively attractive, maybe “unconventionally” (idk another thing people say). I’m funny and entertaining and I listen but I don’t get any of that reciprocated. had this issue for years. not sure what I’m supposed to do tbh. kinda just feel like a placeholder til they all find their “people”. until then I’m a good time i guess. but people generally also infantilize me too so maybe that also plays a part. feel like everybody always trying to humble me or something or talk down on me. I’ve also commonly experienced codependency and possessiveness from female friends not sure if that also has anything to do with it. idk where I’m going with this I’ve never made a post like this I just don’t have anybody to talk to or be vulnerable with