A few months ago, I told my husband I didn’t had the needed money to pay my flight ticket to come for our wedding, to which he said that he will paid for it. (it wasn’t bad planning on my side, I got my paycheck significantly reduced to a mere 160€ because of a miscalculation from this messed up system🫠)
But, he changed versions until the moment to take the ticket :
Version 1 : he will pay for it
Version 2 : he will pay the first payment then I cover the rest of the months
Reality : I paid the first payment and I’ve been covering the installment.
Since that I managed to pay for it by not paying my bills and not having anything to pay groceries. 2 days after my surgery, he obviously stressed me out to send him the money because it got deducted from his account since the installment was taken on his name.
Today, I let him know, again, this is the only money I have left for the month, that I’m soon to leave the clinic so i obviously need money for groceries and buying the needed medical materials but his answer to it was “lol we both know this ain’t about the money nor about the install payment So I’ll let you rock considering your health condition and the stress on you I love you too”
Months prior my hospitalization it was “it’s because you haven’t eaten in a while”, there’s always something to deflect, never “ah I see the issue” and it’s driving me insane. And obviously each month he has an excuse to “why not doing 50/50”.
(We currently don’t live together, he was about to move in but well… with how things are politically, his airport is closed)
TL;DR:
My husband promised to pay for my flight for our wedding, then changed the plan so I ended up paying the deposit and the installments myself. I’ve been struggling financially because of it, even skipping bills and groceries. After my surgery he pressured me to send money for the installment (since the payment comes from his account). When I told him this is the only money I have left for the month and that I’ll need it for food and medical supplies once I leave the clinic, he dismissed the issue by saying it’s “not really about the money” and blamed my stress/health instead. This keeps happening—whenever I raise a concrete issue, he deflects instead of acknowledging it.