Two weeks ago I found out I’m pregnant.
We were in an on-and-off relationship for about 15 months. The connection between us was incredibly intense. The chemistry was the kind that makes you feel like you’ve known someone forever. Being around him felt electric.
But that intensity also came with a really unhealthy dynamic. A lot of arguing. A lot of push and pull. Breaking up, getting pulled back in, trying again, crashing again.
It was intoxicating but also completely exhausting.
At the end of January I finally decided I couldn’t keep doing it anymore. As much as I cared about him, the toll it was taking on my mental and emotional health was too much. I ended things and meant it this time.
A few weeks later my period came and went. Something felt off so I took a test. Positive.
When I reached out to tell him, he reacted with anger and cruelty. He told me to fuck off forever and said a lot of degrading things about me and about the pregnancy.
That was the last time I heard from him.
It’s been two weeks now and the silence has been deafening.
Everyone around me has opinions about what I should do. Demand child support. Contact his family. Tell the mother of his other child. Make him take responsibility.
But none of that is what hurts the most right now.
What hurts is realizing that someone who once held me, laughed with me, slept beside me, and told me he cared about me can just disappear the moment things become real.
This should be one of the biggest, most transformative moments of my life. And instead of feeling supported, I feel incredibly alone.
Some moments I feel strong and determined to do this. Other moments I just feel like I was thrown away like garbage.
I guess I’m just wondering if anyone else has gone through something like this. Finding out you’re pregnant and the other person completely disappears.